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Category Archives: Uncategorized

12 Amazing Big Data Success Stories for 2016

22 Tuesday Dec 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in Big Data, Big Data 7s, Big Data Analytics, Consider this, Data Warehouse, Data Warehousing, Good Strat, Good Strategy, Inform, educate and entertain., IT strategy, Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones, The Big Data Contrarians, Uncategorized

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Big Data, Data Warehousing, goodstrat, Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones


If this piece tickles your fancy, then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians on LinkedIn:

https://www.linkedin.com/groups/8338976

Every year I ask myself the same question. Will there be any tangible, coherent and verifiable Big Data success stories in the coming year? Every year I come up with nothing. Nothing at all. “Sorry, no rooms at the Big Data Success Inn, as we are closed for vacations.”

However, this year things are different. More positive, more alive and more fantastic. Continue reading →

Big Data: And the Hype Played On

10 Thursday Dec 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in Ask Martyn, Big Data, Big Data Analytics, business strategy, Good Strat, Good Strategy, goodstrat, Inform, educate and entertain., IT strategy, Marty does, Martyn does, Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones, Strategy, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians, Uncategorized

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MARTYN RICHARD JONES

Despite the best efforts of Hadoop evangelists, consulting houses, and IT infrastructure and service vendors, Big Data – hailed as the greatest thing since the dawn of greatest things – is failing, and dramatically so, to produce the necessarily corresponding quantity and quality of tangible, detailed and verifiable success stories.
Continue reading →

The Big Data Contrarians At 1000

07 Monday Dec 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in Big Data, Cambriano, Consider this, Good Strategy, goodstart, goodstrat, Martyn Jones, The Big Data Contrarians, Uncategorized

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Big Data, Martyn Jones


First things first. The Big Data Contrarians (“a hype free Agora for Big Data dialogue”) is now a community of over one thousand professionals. Continue reading →

Big Data Predictions for 2015: What happened next?

07 Monday Dec 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in Big Data, Big Data Analytics, business strategy, Good Strat, Good Strategy, goodstrat, IT strategy, Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones, Strategy, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians, Uncategorized

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2015, Big Data, Martyn Jones, Predictions


Towards the end of 2014 I gazed into the amazingly incredible crystal ball called Good Strategy, well known and admired by the readers of the Good Strat Blog, and made some predictions about Big Data for the year to come. The year of the goat. As I write now we are reaching the end of the wonderful year of 2015 – an anno quite-allrightus. So, equipped with good cheer, emboldened by the thoughts of passing the vacations with loved ones, friends and family, and heartened by my impending (albeit temporary) demobilization, I have decided to look back at my predictions of a year ago, to see how accurate or mistaken they ‘have become’, and to share those reflections with you. Continue reading →

The banality of Big Data hype

05 Saturday Dec 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in Big Data, Good Strat, Good Strategy, Inform, educate and entertain., Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones, Rant, Uncategorized

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Good Strategy, Martyn Jones, Martyn Jones Data, Rant


Nauseated by the non-stop crap, railroading and bullying tactics from a reduced group of snotty little techno bastards? Disgusted by the crass propaganda, crude instrumentalisation and fetid boloney from the likes of Bernie, Vinnie, Spats and an attendant entourage of snake-oil merchants and  brain-dead sycophants? Sick and tired of the amazing, incredible and fabulous velocities, varieties and volumes of  Big Data bullshit washing the decks of the SS LinkedIn? Well, be sick and tired no longer. Here is the antidote!

Some interesting Big Data facts to think about this weekend.

I. More Big Data bullshit has been created in the last couple of years, than in the entire history of humankind.
II. Big Data bullshit will grow faster than ever before, in spite of what Gartner say to the contrary.
III. By 2021, if the mega-trending nonsense does not go unabated, there will be 40 megabytes of Big Data bullshit created for every living woman, man and child, every sixty seconds.
IV. Also, in 2021 the accumulated digital universe of Big Data bullshit will grow from 8 spartabytes to 22 marrsabytes.
V. Every second people are thinking about creating new Big Data bullshit. For example, 20 million search queries alone (per minute) are generated with the sole intent of creating even more Big Data bullshit. This is set to grow to over 100 thousand brazilian bulslhit queries per year by 2020.
VI. Every minute an estimated 280 hours of Big Data oriented porn is uploaded to the ‘next greatest thing since sliced bread and butter pudding‘ network.
VII. By 2017 over 1 trillion Big Data bullshitters will be connected via Facebook.
VIII. Facebook usage by Big Data bullshitters will make the current social media scene look like a walk in the bullring.
IX. In 2015, an astounding 1 million trolleyloads of photos were uploaded to the web every single hour of the day. By 2017, nearly 80% of photos taken will include a cameo by one or more smartass Big Data bullshit artist.
X. This year, over 4 billion smartass Big Data bullshitters will be shipped – all packed with communication devices capable of collecting and communicating all kinds of Big Data bullshit, not to mention the Big Data bullshit the amazing Big Data babblers create themselves.
XI. By 2020, we will have over 8 billion Big Data idiot savants (overtaking sentient and rational human beings).
XII. Within five years there will be over 5 billion Big Data smartasses connected in the world, all developed to collect, analyze and share Big Data bullshit.
XIII. By 2020, at least a third of all Big Data bullshit will pass through the bullshit cloud (a network of Big Data bullshit servers connected over the Big Data bullshit Internet).
XIV. Distributed Big Data bullshitting (performing Big Data bullshitting tasks using a network of computers in the cloud) is very real. Google uses it every day to involve about 10 Big Data bullshitters in answering a single search query, which takes no more that 0.2 weeks to complete.
XV. The Hadoop Bullshit Ecosystem (open bullshit software for distributed bullshitting) market is forecast to grow at a compound annual growth rate 299,258% surpassing $111 billion by 2021.
XVI. Estimates suggest that by better integrating Big Data bullshit, we could save as much as $300Bn a year on smoking, drinking and having a wild time. That’s equal to reducing costs by $1000000 a year for every person on earth.
XVII. The White House, who first recognized Big Data as the bullshit it is, has already invested more than $200 in big data bullshit projects.
XVIII. For an archetypal Fortune 1000 company, just a 10% increase in data accessibility will result in more than $650 billion additional net income.
XIX. Retailers who leverage the full power of big data could increase their operating margins by as much as 36,660%
XX. 173% of organizations have already invested or plan to invest in big data bullshit by 2099.

Many thanks for reading. Think about it. I hope you get the message.

The Digital Document Lifecycle

01 Tuesday Dec 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in data architecture, Data governance, data management, ECM, good start, Good Strat, Good Strategy, governance, Management, Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones, Uncategorized

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Content Management, ECM, Good Strat, Martyn Jones, Strategy


The Digital Document Lifecycle

MARTYN RICHARD JONES

To begin at the beginning

This is a story of the life of a digital document. Its purpose is to explain the process of analysing, designing, building, testing and delivering content rich business artefacts in today’s digital age.

Continue reading →

Big Data with BIG SMILES

23 Monday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in Big Data, Big Data Analytics, Business Intelligence, Cambriano, Data Supply Framework, Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones, Methodology, Process, SMILES, Strategy, Uncategorized

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Having got your attention I would like to introduce you to a pragmatic, real-world and business centric approach to Big Data and Big Data Analytics. When I say that this is the best approach to Big Data you are ever likely to find in the whole universe and in your entire life, I am still significantly understating the magnificent utility, timeliness and the here-and-now facets of the approach. Continue reading →

What can data warehousing do for us now?

22 Sunday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in Banking, Uncategorized

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A makeover for big data, analytics and everything

Welcome to the new kid on the block, same as the old kid but sharper, tougher and even more relevant to business than before. Who can it be, what do we call her and where does she live?

Well here’s a surprise. The newcomer is none other than the 4th generation of Enterprise Data Warehousing. Ready and prepared to elevate Big Data, Analytics and an accompanying wealth of must-have data accessories to the dizzying heights of value-adding, business-changing and stakeholder-pleasing usefulness, utility and usability.

Read the full article on the IT Circus blog hosted by IT World: http://www.itworld.com/article/3006473/big-data/what-can-data-warehousing-do-for-us-now.html 

Big Data: 10 truths, 10 myths and 10 unwise things

17 Tuesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in Ask Martyn, Big Data, Data Warehousing, Inform, educate and entertain., Information Management, Uncategorized

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Big Data, enterprise data warehousing, Martyn Jones, Strategy


StartSMILESMany people come up to me in the street and beg me to write about the truths, myths and unwise things said about Big Data. I am offered gifts of goats, partners and riches beyond the dreams of avarice just to pronounce on such things. I am not in the habit of bowing to such street-pressure, but I have finally come round to doing something, if only to placate the river of rose-petal bearing infants’ tears flowing past my abode.

Big Data is for everyone

Continue reading →

Is LinkedIn Worse Than Facebook?

17 Tuesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Jones in Martyn Jones, Professional Networking, Social Media, Uncategorized

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Martyn Jones, Professional Networking, social media


To begin at the beginning

I know. I know! Who the hell poses a question like that? Is LinkedIn Worse Than Facebook? Who can say? Or, as my great auntie, Werner von Braun might have said, “If you are dumb enough to ask such a question, then you will surely be too stupid to understand a credible answer”.

I have seen it a lot over the years, perfectly irrational people posing perfectly cogent and simple questions, and then not being able to answer those questions themselves. It is good to see logic and good sense prevail, even if the observables are marginally more surreal than mundane.

Now me. I quite despise the whole Facebook shtick, but because so many of family, friends an acquaintances use it, I feel almost compelled to be there, even if in spirit only. It doesn`t help either that some of the founders of the social media biz had and have such goddam awful personalities, scummy little twerps for which adjectives such as nasty, mean-spirited and ruthlessly exploitative don’t even begin to give one a good picture.

But, do I think that LinkedIn is worse than Facebook?

A bit like your favourite grandma telling a very rude joke, the number one reason is quite simple. Just as no one expected The Inquisition, so no one expects LinkedIn to be worse than Facebook, and when the realization hits the fan, it’s even more alarming, because in no small part, it’s so unexpected. Whereas when it comes to Facebook, no one expects any better, so it doesn’t disappoint, at least, not to anything like the same degree.

Students of Seneca will realise straight away that this is the case, and even understand why it’s such a more disappointing experience to be mugged by social media that seems to be used by professional and ethical people like us, which creates a false sense of security and an expectation that quite often results in serial disappointment and disenchantment.

But, clearly this is not going well.

I can tell I´m not getting far with the angle I adopted for this piece. I know that because I tried this approach at a consulting gig quite recently at a theatre in Barcelona, and although a small part of the crowd quickly got what I was trying to convey, albeit they were an intelligent and radical underground, the majority just looked at me, like a happy-pack of expectant puppies waiting for the magic word. Therefore, I expect you are doing the very same thing right now.

Am I right, or am I right?

I probably have a flawed, jaded and perhaps overly-severe notion of concepts such as professionalism, ethics and quality of life, an outlook that also finds resonance in my views on professional social media and online networking, and those who plumb these depths.

Everyone can lie, cheat, misrepresent, trick, fool and befuddle, but I prefer to think that as professionals we could also do the same, in our own interests, but that we consciously chose not to.

Which is why I am appalled by those self-styled professionals who go out of their way to give misleading, erroneous and harmful advice on a wide range of subjects. When this happens down the pub it’s to be taken with a huge pinch of salt. When people use what is ostensibly taken as a serious professional networking site and experts’ platform to deceive, beguile and scam those who know no better.

What about the motivational advice that will drag peoples’ moral down to the level of their shoe laces?

What about the leadership advice that will get people into hot water and possibly get them fired?

What about bamboozling bullshit babblers who use their faux-expertise to railroad the susceptible, gullible and impressionable into committing, time money and effort to embrace crack-pot ideas and embrace untenable projects?

What about the detritus that glibly sells delusional bullshit and harmless fantasy as liberation, career-advancing and life-changing?

Why is it that economic power, military power, matchless arrogance, wilful ignorance and cultural imperialism go hand in hand?

Take another look yourself if you don’t believe me. Look at the leadership pieces, the motivational pieces, the life-style pieces, the sports pieces, the cracker-barrel racist, sexist and classist shit flogged as legitimate political opinion. Dig deep. Embrace thought and reason. Learn or hone critical thinking. Then you too will be able to ask the searching questions, if you aren’t doing so already. Get in there and ask! What is this bullshit? How the hell am I going to speak with my boss, me partner, my children, etc. like that without really losing out? Why is Big Data for everyone? Why should I care about IoT? What in the name of Sam Adams is my personal data doing on the Cloud? What the fuck do those who live cocooned in their self-imposed ‘Culture of Contentment’ know about my problems, my difficulties, my family, my family and friends, my community and my world?

Is there anything else?

However, not all is lost, and you can continue in the world of social media without exposing yourself to any nasty surprises. The solution is easy. Either do not partake or set your expectations very low, especially in the case of the hype and bullshit infested networks.

Still don’t see it?

In that case, just ask yourself this question: what was better, the Black Death or the bubonic plague?

All it now needs are for the music to come in and the credits to roll, European art-house cine style, as I leave with a “there you have it”.

There you have it. A blog piece that not only reflects on the levels of triteness, opportunism and boring nature of a pseudo-professional and achingly postmodern web site, but a representative piece that also tries to embody all of that banality, manipulation and awkwardness in less than one thousand words. I hope that this piece provided some food for thought, if nothing much else.

Many thanks for reading.

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