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Category Archives: agile@scale

Energising the Agile Way of Working brand and mindset

10 Monday Jun 2019

Posted by Martyn Jones in agile, agile way of working, agile@scale, business strategy, Good Strategy, Good Strategy Radio, IT strategy, Strategy

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On my way to Léon

Martyn Richard Jones

Brussels 10th June 2019

Today I want to talk with you about energising the Agile Way of Working brand.

Sadly, the Agile Way of Working movement seems to be temporarily on the wane. The adoption rate of AWOW has not risen in line with expectations. It’s stuck in the doldrums between Scylla and Charybdis. Which makes for frowns all around.

But, me being me, I didn’t leave it at that. That’s a challenge, right there! Let’s go for it! Let’s turn those frowns upside-down

As result, I searched for a way to help the Agile@Scale crowd out, and I eventually came up with ten amazing pieces of incredible advice on how to easily make ‘Agile Way of Working’ truly something worth having around.

So, here we have it:

  1. First, change its name from the Agile Way of Working to the Agile Way of Whacking Off (Agile WOWO), you know, a touchy-feely way to “sex up” requirements. Bush and Blair style.
  2. Epics will be referred to as Dodgy Dossiers, User Stories will become Curated Jokes and Sprints will become Streaks.
  3. People working on Streaks will be known as Streakers, chapter members will be known as Schleppers and guild members will be known as Schmucks, everyone else will be referred to as Bernie or Helen.
  4. Every morning Dodgy Dossier Owners must repeat the term “Agile Operating Model” until they puke their guts out.
  5. All Scrum and Kanban boards are be replaced with life-sized wack-a-mole models.
  6. Only those kitted out as My Little Pony or Princess Line can use coloured post-it notes.
  7. Anyone caught using the names Google, Spotify, Netflix or Zappos.com will be denied the oxygen of publicity.
  8. Anyone evidenced repeating the terms “by design”, “learning journey” and “minimum viable product” will be denied the oxygen of oxygen.
  9. Anyone caught using comic images of rockets, astronauts or planets (including the sun) anywhere in their “content” will be forever referred to as a feckin space-cadet.
  10. If you can’t defecate rainbows on demand then you have no right being involved in Agile at Scale or the Agile Way of Whacking Off.

There you have it. Ten jolly and sensible policies for a happy world of Agile at Scale and Agile WOWO.

Many thanks for reading,

This is Martyn Jones of goodstrat.com – THE GOOD STRATEGY COMPANY

Until next time.

Contact me at martyn dot jones at goodstrat dot com

Agile at Scale is bullshit by design

28 Tuesday May 2019

Posted by Martyn Jones in agile, agile@scale, All Data, Architecture, Assets, awareness, behaviour, business strategy, Creativity, Dogma, IT strategy, Strategy, structured intellectual capital, Value

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cropped-p4010326.jpgMartyn Ricard Jones

Bruxelles 28th May 2019

To begin at the beginning

To paraphrase the great Bob Hoffman. Just when you thought that if evangelists for Agile were to generate one more ounce of bullshit the entire fucking solar system would explode, what do they do? Exceed expectations.

And how did they do that? Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you to Agile at Scale with all the miscellaneous, spiced-up and vainglorious crap-on-the-side that accompanies it.

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Learning journey – Agile@Scale – The video

22 Wednesday May 2019

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, agile, agile@scale

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