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Category Archives: The Amazing Big Data Challenge

Data Trailblazers: 2022 Vision

02 Sunday Jan 2022

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, All Data, data management, data mesh, Data Supply Framework, Data Warehouse, no limits, The Amazing Big Data Challenge

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Data Trailblazers: 2022 Vision

Martyn Richard Jones

2nd January 2022

Martyn Jones is Chief Scientist and Information Architect at Cambriano Energy, and is the author of Laughing @ Big Data he manages The Big Data Contrarian group on LinkedIn and blogs at goodstrat.com

To begin at the beginning

So, the Christmas season is almost upon us, and it’s time once again to publish my brand-spanking new top twelve data trend predictions for the new year, 2022.

Continue reading →

Big data’s unvirtuous circus and twelve v-words

17 Sunday May 2020

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, Big Data, Big Data 7s, Big Data Analytics, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians

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Martyn Richard Jones

Bonn; Germany

LINK: Laugh at Big Data – download my ebook for free on 17th May.

Many people come up to me in the street and ask me what big-data is all about. It has happened to me so many times in the past that I am convinced that it might just happen to you as well. I know sort of thing, I read the big-data tea leaves. Nothing gets past me.

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Data must adapt or die!

03 Wednesday Jul 2019

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, All Data, Big Data, Big Data 7s, Big Data Analytics, dark data, data architecture, Data governance, Data Lake, data management, Data Mart, data science, Data Supply Framework, Data Warehouse, Data Warehousing, pig data, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians

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Martyn Richard Jones

Our bloke in Brussels, 3rd July 2019

It’s a simple, timeless, human truth; data must adapt or die.

Read between the lines, the writing on the wall, the fat lady singing and the barking dogs at the gate.

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Saving Private Hadoop

07 Friday Jun 2019

Posted by Martyn Jones in Big Data, Big Data 7s, Big Data Analytics, hadoop, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians

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Brussels 7th June 2019

Martyn Richard Jones

By all accounts Hadoop is heading down the pan and bits of big data are not that far behind.

But should we rejoice?

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What if the Hadoop Ecosphere Were a Box of Chocolates

12 Tuesday Dec 2017

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, Big Data, Big Data 7s, Big Data Analytics, hadoop, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians

≈ 1 Comment

Giant-Chocolate-Elephant

Martyn Richard Jones

Gif sur Yvette, 12th December 2017

Just because it looks like a bunch of half-baked crap, based on some well shoddy ideas and made by a surfeit of half-arsed chancers, doesn’t mean that it is, does it…

Even though it is.

Sorry! But, I digress.

If the Hadoop ecosphere were a box of chocolates, it would come in fantastic packaging that would make the grandest of Belgian chocolatiers emerald green with envy.

Continue reading →

The Bastards of Big Data: You can’t blame Putin for all of this bullshit

07 Saturday Oct 2017

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, Big Data, Big Data 7s, Big Data Analytics, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians

≈ 1 Comment

Image4Martyn Richard Jones

Gif sur Yvette 7th October 2017

In my life, I have never seen such a destructive and mindless movement in data architecture and management as that which has been nurtured, groomed and promoted by those who labour relentlessly, perfidiously and insidiously to ensure the continued and simultaneously unbelievable relevance of disruptive corporate-terrorising Big Data bullshitters, venomous data-oil hucksters and PowerPoint enabled know-nothing digital-arseholes. Continue reading →

Business Data Explained: The Long Read

07 Saturday Oct 2017

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, All Data, Big Data, Big Data 7s, Big Data Analytics, dark data, data architecture, Data governance, Data Lake, data management, Data Mart, data science, Data Supply Framework, Data Warehouse, Data Warehousing, pig data, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians

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Tags

data

Martyn Richard Jones, Gif sur Yvette 23rd September 2017

Integrity

Hi, Friends. As always, it’s great to be able to engage with you again. I am writing to you from the splendorous, wooded and verdant French town of Gif sur Yvette, and I wanted to take this opportunity to address aspects of data for an audience beyond the interests of data management and architecture people.

There is confusion about some of the fundamental aspects of business data, and there shouldn’t. If we strip away all of the boloney, it’s a subject that is quite approachable. In short, ‘it is not rocket surgery’. Continue reading →

5 Simple Tips to Help You Survive the Big Data Bullshit Revolution

02 Sunday Jul 2017

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, All Data, Big Data, Big Data Analytics, dark data, data architecture, Data governance, Data Lake, data management, Data Mart, data science, Data Supply Framework, Data Warehouse, Data Warehousing, pig data, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians

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Tags

data integration, data management

Image1Afilonius Rex

Dunny on the Wold, 1st July 2017

The 4th big data bullshit is here, and it is completely reimagining the way we conceptualise, think and reason. This amazingly and imaginary Govesque world is driven by hyperbole and mendacity distributed via interconnected digital devices that are capable of amassing and fermenting ever-growing amounts of big data bullshit.

Continue reading →

Become an Instant Big Data Rock Star with 10 Insider Tips from the Top

28 Sunday May 2017

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, All Data, Big Data, Big Data Analytics, dark data, data architecture, Data governance, Data Lake, data management, Data Mart, data science, Data Supply Framework, Data Warehouse, Data Warehousing, humour, pig data, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians

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002Martyn Richard Jones  

Talacharn, 28th May 2017

Folks! Here I bring you ten amazing tips from some of Big Data’s great and good. Tips that will help you become the Big Data Rock Star that you have always dreamed of being.

But first, a question.

What’s the sexiest job in the 21st century? Continue reading →

How to turn internal user data into a massive liability – Zéro pièce

18 Thursday May 2017

Posted by Martyn Jones in 4th generation Data Warehousing, All Data, Ask Martyn, Big Data, Big Data 7s, Big Data Analytics, business strategy, dark data, data architecture, Data governance, Data Lake, data management, Data Mart, data science, Data Supply Framework, Data Warehouse, Good Strat, Good Strategy, Good Strategy Radio, goodstrat, IT strategy, Marty does, Martyn does, Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones, pig data, Strategy, The Amazing Big Data Challenge, The Big Data Contrarians

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5

Martyn Richard Jones

Laugharne 18th May 2017

“Our discreditable secret is that we don’t know anything at all, and our horrid inner secret is that we don’t care that we don’t.”

― Dylan Thomas

Let me explain

I read a poster the other, it read “How To Turn Internal User Data Into Revenue”. It was one of those Facebook or LinkedIn hooks, you know, the ones used to get people to spend precious time on useless pursuits.

It reminded me of a book that my mother-in-law bought for my partner, many, many moons ago. “How to make a mint whilst you snooze”, or some such wacky title.

Continue reading →

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Recent posts

  • Data Trailblazers: 2022 Vision January 2, 2022
  • Tea with The Data Contrarian: Afilonius Rex December 10, 2021
  • Reality Check: Data Mesh and Data Warehousing   December 5, 2021
  • Myth-busting: Data Mesh and Data Warehousing – Revisited November 25, 2021
  • Heaven help us! Have you seen the latest Virtual Data Warehouse bullshit? June 26, 2020
  • DATA! STRATEGY, INNOVATION AND VALUE BULLSHIT June 9, 2020
  • Big data’s unvirtuous circus and twelve v-words May 17, 2020
  • Laughing at Big Data – What’s on the inside May 16, 2020
  • Why I called bullshit on the data lakehouse nonsense May 16, 2020
  • Laugh at Big Data – download my ebook for free on 17th May. May 16, 2020

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