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Category Archives: Big Data

Posts that contain a reference to Big Data

Who’s afraid of the Big Data Contrarians? Here’s 500 reasons not to be

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in All Data, Big Data, Business Intelligence, Cambriano, Consider this, Good Strategy, Inform, educate and entertain., Strategy

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

All Data, Analytics, aspiring tendencies in IM, Big Data, cambriano, Martyn Jones, The Big Data Contrarians

A lively indoor gathering with people socialising, some wearing festive hats, and a woman in a traditional blue dress with polka dots. Flags hang from the ceiling, adding to the celebratory atmosphere.
The fair in Córdoba, Spain.

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians:

Join The Big Data Contrarians here: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks.

When I first started The Big Data Contrarians group on LinkedIn I was thinking that maybe we would get 100 members within three or four months. Well, I was mistaken. Since the 1st of July, the membership ranks of The Big Data Contrarians has risen to over 500 members. However, it’s not about the quantity it’s about the quality, and The Big Data Contrarians is ‘the nicest Big Data community that you are ever likely to encoun

Continue reading →

Big Data is Bullshit

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in All Data, Big Data, Data Lake, Inform, educate and entertain., Martyn Jones

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Big Data, goodstrat, Martyn Jones

“I’ve been accused of vulgarity. I say that’s bullshit.” – Mel Brooks

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians:

Join The Big Data Contrarians here: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Being brutally honest, Big Data is bullshit. Not only is Big Data bullshit but it comes with a surfeit of pranksters, pundits and prissy big data bullshit-babblers, all willing (cue narration by Morgan Freeman) to “big-up Big Data in a vulgar, ill-mannered and predictably nauseating dance of professional-hustling… as old as time.”

However, is all Big Data bullshit? Is it all a fad, a load of old tripe and a confusion of weasels together with their surfeit of weasel words? Or, is there something of value, substance and tangibility to be found amongst the volumes, velocities and varieties of brazen and opportunistic self-aggrandizement, toxic speculation and opinions and unverifiable miracles?

For Google, Facebook and Twitter, Big Data certainly isn’t BS. For example, Google rely on Big Data as the biggest irreplaceable element in their colossal advertising business – so I am lead to believe. A business that accounts for more than 90% of Google’s revenue. So clearly, for the masters of web-based unstructured and complex search, Big Data is an essential element in their business model. The biggest essential element by far.

However, let´s be honest, we should consider the obvious. How many of us are really going to do business like Google?

Big Data technology and service vendors benefit tangibly from the Big Data movement, at least this is the impression that I get. Indeed, there is much talk about the relationship between Big Data, the Hadoop ecosphere and the big wild world of open source, but what is more interesting is that companies are bringing in revenue on the back of Big Data by offering battle-hardened business and enterprise versions of open source software. Then there is the business in consulting, with such a demand for Big Data gurus, Master Data Scientists and Number Conjurors, there must presumably be real people working in these roles, and paid handsomely for doing so.

But apart from the ‘success’ associated with the foundation of so many Big Data start-up businesses and the market-based commitment of some of ITs’ ‘great and good’ to the new digital zeitgeist of data volumes, velocities and varieties, just where are the other success stories of Big Data coming from?

To help us in our quest, I earlier compiled a not-so-exhaustive list of Big Data success stories, celebrity-chef like, to help us out. Here are some of the Big Data gems that I managed to track down:

  • Thanks to Big Data, the taxi service alternative channel Uber is making massive waves and shaking things up in the transport sector.
  • By leveraging Big Data AirBnB is turning the hospitality business on its head, and what´s more, making friends, and influencing people as they are doing so.
  • Amazon would not be what they are today if it were not for Big Data, in fact, without Big Data, they would be nothing.
  • One of the industries that will suffer revolutionary transformation because of Big Data will be the banking industry.
  • Big Data will increase the GDP of the USA by at least 1% or more, and the Spanish GDP could likewise add an additional 1%, for similar reasons.

These would be all great headlines for Big Data success stories, apart from one small flaw. None of them is exactly a Big Data success story in the Big Data defining characteristics of volumes, varieties and velocities of mainly unstructured data or in terms of the Hadoop technological kitchen-drawer ecosphere.

Something is happening, and it is not exactly legitimate. Can you guess what it is yet?

When it rains it pours, and when it rains Big Data hype it quickly turn into a monsoon of cloying hysteria. Spotting and pointing at Big Data bullshit babblers on forums like LinkedIn Pulse, Forbes and Information Management is no fun, unless your fun is nuking a school of intellectually challenged fish floundering in a barrel of vintage Malmsey.

However, it not only is no fun, but also more times than not it is a complete and utter waste of time trying to get people to adopt a more critical approach to thinking. Because for every Big Data bullshit babbler, there is a battalion of intransigent Big Data believers stuck in untenable and absurd positions, marooned from reason and ways back to rationality. You can’t use logic against belief, and you can´t turn back a rising tide of IT refugees who are desperately seeking succour in the apparently safer-havens of Big Data, Data Science and Data-driven voodoo.

Only the other day I read that “The emergence of Big Data is now allowing CEOs to increasingly base decisions on current “reality” rather than past experience, but the risks in the integrity and fullness of the data that they are “seeing” and “hearing” is often a barrier to getting a clear picture of what is actually going on.” This is really taking shameless baloney and wilful ignorance to all new heights, but it doesn’t stop there.

Elsewhere another eminent Big Data bullshit babbler wrote, “Clearly big data and AI will change almost every industry this decade… but none more than these”, referring vaguely and vacuously to “Healthcare, Finance and Insurance”.  What species of shameless and fatuous willy-waving goes so far out on a limb that it becomes massively removed from even being a grandiose and beguiling ‘bigging-up’ of a fad?

Finally yet importantly, I almost choked on my supersized Big Data popcorn the other day when I read, “Today, with the rise of the Internet, we capture “data” on everything.  Therefore, the new term “Big Data” is honestly like 1985 again.  But this time, Big Data will actually be really big and by some forecasts, be a $40 billion industry by 2018.”

This is not hype, it is not even simple deceit, it is astroturfing of 22 carat bullshit, and in most cases it’s clearly deliberate, it´s intentional and it´s grossly misleading. So why do people do it?

Given that Big Data is very much a niche technology, with very much a niche appeal, why do so many buffoons go around pretending that Big Data is for all of us? Like as if it was some sort of digital universal-panacea, when at the moment, and at best, it is a walk on bit-player with just a couple of lies who aspires to B actor status. In this sense, at present Big Data isn´t even the hero´s best friend.

Before I close the piece, I will leave you with the thoughts of Dan Ariely. Why? Because it just irritates the hell out of a section of the community of Big Data bullshit babblers, and it´s actually very accurate. Here it is:

“Big data is like teenage sex: everyone talks about it, nobody really knows how to do it, everyone thinks everyone else is doing it, so everyone claims they are doing it…”

Many thanks for reading.

In subsequent blog pieces I will be sharing my views on the evolution of information management in general, and the incorporation novel and innovative techniques, technologies and methods into well architected mainstream information supply frameworks, for primarily strategic and tactical objectives.

As always, please reach out and share your questions, views and criticisms on this piece using the comment box below. I frequently write about strategy, organisational, leadership and information technology topics, trends and tendencies. You are more than welcome to keep up with my posts by clicking the ‘Follow’ link and perhaps you will even consider sending me a LinkedIn invite if you feel our data interests coincide. Also feel free to connect via Twitter, Facebook and the Cambriano Energy website.

For more on this and other topics, check out some of my other posts:

Looking for your most valuable data? Follow the money – http://www.itworld.com/article/2982352/big-data/looking-for-your-most-valuable-data-follow-the-money.html

Stuff a great data architect should know –http://goodstrat.com/2015/08/16/stuff-a-great-data-architect-should-know-how-to-be-a-professional-expert

Big Data, the promised land where ‘smart’ is the new doh!–https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-promised-land-where-smart-new-doh-martyn-jones?trk=prof-post

Absolutely Fabulous Big Data Roles –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/absolutely-fabulous-big-data-roles-martyn-jones?trk=prof-post

Not banking on Big Data? – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/banking-big-data-martyn-jones?trk=prof-post

10 amazing reasons to join The Big Data Contrarians –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/10-amazing-reasons-join-big-data-contrarians-martyn-jones?trk=prof-post

Amazing Data Warehousing with Hadoop and Big Data–https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/cloudera-kimball-dw-building-disinformation-factory-martyn-jones?trk=prof-post

The Big Data Contrarians: The Agora for Big Data dialogue–https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-contrarians-agora-dialogue-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

The Big Data Shell Game – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-shell-game-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Aligning Data Warehousing and Big Data –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/aligning-data-warehousing-big-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Big Data Luddites – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-luddites-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Data Warehousing Explained to Big Data Friends –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/data-warehousing-explained-big-friends-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Big Data, a promised land where the Big Bucks grow –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-promised-land-where-bucks-grow-martyn-jones-6023459994031177728?trk=mp-reader-card

The Big Data Contrarians – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-contrarians-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Is big data really for you? Things to consider before diving in–https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-really-you-things-consider-before-diving-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Big Data Explained to My Grandchildren –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-explained-my-grandchildren-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians:

Join The Big Data Contrarians here: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks, Martyn.

The Million-Dollar Big Data Briefing

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in agile, Big Data, Consider this, Data Lake, Inform, educate and entertain., Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones

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All Data, Analytics, Big Data

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks, Martyn.

Big Data, together with Cloud computing, the Internet of Things and Machine Learning, are topics that are very much to the fore in contemporary trends in Information Management. But is Big Data really the revolution that people have been waiting for or is it simply about the next steps in the evolution of business data architecture and management?  Continue reading →

Big Data and Catfish

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Business Intelligence, goodstrat, Inform, educate and entertain., Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones

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Big Data, Bill Inmon, catfish, goodstrat, Martyn Jones

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks, Martyn.

“Contrary to slanderous Eastern opinion, much of Iowa is not flat, but rolling hills country with a lot of timber, a handsome and imaginative landscape, crowded with constant small changes of scene and full of little creeks winding with pools where shiners, crappies and catfish hover.”

Paul Engle

Catfish are said to be named because of their passing resemblance to land-roving felines. Admittedly, it’s not like any cat I’ve seen around the house, but if you simultaneously squint your eyes – impressionist style, guzzle a quart of bourbon and smoke a stash of ganja then maybe the resemblance becomes more obvious.

Catfish come in all sizes and varieties, at times they are native and other times they are classed as an alien species, rather like this Welshman who finds himself living in the Spain of Evo Morales, Kirchner and King Mohammed. Nonetheless, you won’t find many thrilling and delightful catfish videos on YouTube nor will you see many entered for the best of breed category at the International Cat Show.

So, what have catfish got to do with Big Data?

Well, there’s loads of them, they come in many varieties, and when they aren’t eating, they can be quite swift. But that’s not what I really wanted to discuss.

Now imagine this. Given the immense geographic dispersion, varieties and volumes of catfish around the world, wouldn’t it be interesting to carry out the Ma and Pa of all Big Data experiments?

We capture – over time of course, this is not the work of one day – all the catfish in the world, and we not only electronically tag them but we also fit them with IoT (Internet of Things) devices that will tell us:

  • Where the catfish is
  • Who the catfish is with
  • What are they doing
  • What are they eating
  • How do they feel in general
  • How do they feel about certain things, like the food they just ate, the company they keep, and what they do for entertainment and distraction, etc.

We could then collect this data, in centers all around the world, and then bring it all together in a massive Catfish Big Data Processing Centre in, for example, Coney Island.

Then the data we have so carefully collected, multiplied twice, and then searched and word-counted, in parallel, can be put to revolutionary, evolutionary and amazing uses such as:

  • Analysing and forecasting the Amazon buying trends of the lost Fukawi tribe – yes, the very same tribe who used to wander around boasting about their culture and presence usually accompanied with cries such as “We’re the Fukawi” or “Where the Fukawi?”
  • Creating appealing, compelling and revenue-busting online interactive ads for Bob Hoffman
  • Predicting the outcome of the US Presidential election, the regional elections in Catalonia and the vote for Chairperson at the Hello Working Person’s Club, Hello Village, in Jolly Olde England.
  • Preventing the outbreak of a world-wide pandemic of universal proportions thanks to Big Data being used to intervene virus-bearing inter-terrestrial vehicles sent by radical-fundamentalist-Martians inhabiting the once munificent planet of Zog.
  • Providing a wealth of material success stories that can be liberally sprinkled like fairy-dust on amazing Big Data stories from the keyboards of some of the finest Big Data bullshit babbling princesses on the entire world wide webs.

Over time, the competence, repertoire and agility of Catfish of all varieties, species, volumes and velocities (did anyone mention Catfish voracity and veracity?) could be augmented, potentiated and expanded by invasive, elliptical and sublime manipulation and neuro-retraining. We could then start with in-aqua interactive stimulus, menu variation and programming and extra-sensory passivation. Later the experiments could be more complex and more all-inclusive, reaching greater and greater degrees of perfection and inclusivity and exclusivity as the Catfish Big Data bandwagon rolled on… Waterlogged, waylaid and none the wiser. Indeed, in the future, all individual decisions will also rely on Catfish input, insight and turbo-charged predictive analytics of great and lasting charm.

Diet manipulation, an habituation test, and chemical analysis of urinary free amino acids were used to demonstrate that bullhead catfish (Ictalurus nebulosus) naturally detect the body odors of conspecifics and respond to them in a predictable fashion. These signals are used in dominance and territorial relationships and lead to increased aggression toward chemical “strangers.” The results support the general notion that nonspecific metabolites, as well as specific pheromones, are important in chemical mediation of social behavior.

There is also one very important thing about catfish that not many people know – apart from Michael Caine, who of course is a leading authority on catfish – and not many people know that either. But, anyway… Catfish are also bottom feeders, this is because of some complex physiological configuration that I won’t go into here – for fear of hurting the sensibilities of the puerilely prudish and wasting valuable drinking time – so in terms of data, the Catfish are able to plumb the depths of the most obtuse, dark and murky data, gobble it up, transform it and… err… load it into Hadoop, to be analyzed with Spark and presented in Excel… or something like that.

So, you’re not convinced by this story? Okay, I didn’t want to tell you this, but here it goes…

Many of us worry about leveraging all data, and mainly we worry because we don’t really have a clue about what we are bullshitting about. We see Big Data, and we believe that is good, whether we know this to be true or not. We are grasping at straws like so many bottom feeders, so many feces-eating walking-catfish, motivated by ideas of maximizing the sale of useless and outdated crap to ignorant people who don’t need it and can’t derive any tangible benefit from it in the first place. This is the biggest takeaway from this current schizophrenic Big Data BS Kulturkampf. Beyond a limited set of interest stories and an even more limited set of peripheral benefits accruable in very specific circumstances, there is nothing tangible that really grabs the attention, apart from the razzle-dazzle, smoke and mirrors of vacuous cant dressed up as showmanship.

The biggest problem with Big Data isn’t so much the plethora of technology (which is more and more reminding me of box of half-eaten chocolates,) nor even the niche applications – for as miraculous and mysterious as most of them are. It’s more about Big Data being turned into a seriously creepy religion, where belief is paramount, and where there is little or no questioning of the tenets, the fables, the dogma and the liturgy, and where one person’s willful ignorance is just as valid as another person’s aspiration to gain knowledge and experience.

Make no mistake, Big Data can be useful for certain businesses and for certain situations. But for many of us in practice it’s either a peripheral player or doesn’t even make it to the bench.

A final thought. Treating Big Data as a religion is foolish, unhelpful and ultimately doomed to failure and ignominy. You have been warned!

For what it’s worth, I am currently writing the Ma and Pa of all Big Data parallel-analytics languages (details to follow), and I might even call it catfish (it’s sorta catchy) and I will have it represented by a muddy-looking open-source cartoon catfish, one worthy of a spot on YouTube.

Many thanks for reading.

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks, Martyn.

The Amazing Big Data Challenge – 2015

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, goodstrat, Inform, educate and entertain., Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones, Strategy, The Amazing Big Data Challenge

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All Data, Big Data, Martyn Jones, Strategy

For those of you who are familiar with the world of Big Data you will also be aware of the vanguard data community known as The Big Data Contrarians (the most fabulous Big Data community online).

Launched today (23 September 2015), the Big Data Contrarian’s Challenge is destined to fast become the most prestigious, enviable and prized challenge on the entire global world-wide-web. Continue reading →

Data Warehousing will save Big Data

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in All Data, Big Data, Data Lake, Inform, educate and entertain.

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Big Data, enterprise data warehousing

Considering the canvas that is the Pacific Ocean. “How on earth” he thought, “can people die of thirst and polluted water, when we have so much fresh, clean and pristine water on this goddam planet?”

The Data Leviathan, Martyn Jones Continue reading →

The Princess Diana Memorial Data Lake

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Data Lake, hadoop, Inform, educate and entertain., Martyn Jones

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Big Data, data lake, Martyn Jones

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks, Martyn.

If Princess Diana had been alive during the formative years of the Big Data revolution there would have been a plethora of influential Big Data bullshit babblers issuing their gushingly awful pieces in places like Forbes, the WSJ and professional blogging forums about the Big Data humanitarian causes closest to the heart of the peoples’ princess. And if tragedy had repeated itself, and had been reported not as paparazzi driven schmaltz or morbid vulgarity, but as something even more rancid and farcical, we would now have a Princess Diana Memorial Data Lake in some regal park in London or Milton Keynes –powered by Hadoop. Because, as the bullshit babblers would have it, “that is what she would have wanted”.

But, is this entirely fair? Should we view the outpourings of the biggest Big Data bullshit babblers on the entire internet as the inevitable result of free will, or is Big Data a message from God, in the same way that hard drugs are a signal to certain rock stars that they have too much available cash?

Which brings me to another issue. In a recent interview, I was given a list of data related terms, and was asked which one I preferred. Big Data, Smart Data, Small Data… you know what I mean. Anyway, I went off on a tangent about domestic pets and anthropomorphism. Okay, so it was logical entrapment, but I wanted to make a point. “Don´t you think that ascribing human behavior and thought to pets is a bit weird?” I asked. “No, came back the reply”. It wasn´t the answer I wanted, because the answer I wanted was “Yes, it certainly is” not a “No, that’s what my mum thinks as well”. I wanted to say see, people who ascribe human characteristics to dogs strike us as being a bit fanciful, but people who do the same for data? How can a bunch of recognizable symbols embody smartness? I mean, data by itself, of itself, is dumber than a rock.

So why do we pretend that the information, knowledge and the smarts are in the data and that data itself, without the need for any intervention (other than Hadoop, Sparke or Hive, etc.), is capable of revealing this smartness?

And the only thing I can think is that we are so desperate to sell useless crap that no one needs or wants, that we are even capable of saying the most dopiest of things in order to do so.

Anyway, I was at a Big Data conference recently, and every presenter selling a tool made exactly the same type of pitch. The amazing ways that their tools could establish correlations. Some of the examples of the correlations were so contrived, so obviously the creation of PR than the outcome of hands-off automated analysis, that it became seriously embarrassing, not as a professional, but as a human being. What´s more, no one mentioned the absent elephantine concept of causation, so everyone who went in clueless stayed happy in their ignorance throughout the whole wham-bam-tank-you-mam dog and pony session.

Now, I do think that the sort of data processing associated with Big Data does have a place in the old IT toolkit, but the levels of hype, misappropriation and downright lies is seriously queering the pitch. Just look at some of the Big Data articles in places like Forbes, Information Management and LinkedIn. If you haven’t yet noticed the tendency to use tremendous volumes, varieties and velocities of bullshit to push the Big Data envelope, then you really haven’t been paying enough attention.

Many thanks for reading.

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks, Martyn.

Top 20 Big Data Bafflers

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this, Quiz

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Big Data, That dope Marr

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful (or something) then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks, Martyn.

For your amusement, delectable enjoyment and delight, I bring you the first in a series of Big Data Quizzes from The Big Data Contrarians – the nicest, most civilised and congenial Big Data community on the entire World Wide Web. Continue reading →

Big Data, Enterprise Content, Analytics and HR

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Data Supply Framework, Data Warehousing, ECM, enterprise content management, HR, Inform, educate and entertain.

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Big Data, HR

To begin at the beginning

As has been stated elsewhere, human resource management is a content and process intensive activity, which makes it somewhat amenable to the deployment of content and process centric IT solutions. In particular, Enterprise Content Management tools that also offer advanced process design and deployment, would seem to be an ideal fit for any significant and continuous human resource activity.

Like many other activities in business, the roles and responsibilities embodied in human resource management have emerged, developed and transformed over the years, and with subjective improvements and innovations the field has become more complex, more varied and more concentrated – in a wide range of aspects, but especially in terms of the explosive proliferation of process, business rules and content. Continue reading →

Whither Big Data bullshit?

11 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in All Data, Big Data, Good Strategy, goodstrat, Martyn Jones

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All Data, Big Data, Martyn Jones, Martyn Richard Jones

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks, Martyn.

Pundits far and wide are hailing the end of the period of big data babble, hyperbole and bullshit and are looking forward to an epoch of practical, tangible and verifiable Big Data success stories.

Gartner themselves came out some time ago and declared that Big Data was no longer in the hype cycle. Some took this as a sign that the Big Data bullshit bonanza was over, others were more cynical and suspected a highly orchestrated ruse, a move to the next level in the game plan.

But does this new attitude towards Big Data really ring true?

Accompanying this apparent bold openness, frankness and humility in the ranks of the rehabilitated Big Data bullshit babblers there is an awful lot of what appears to be ‘more of the same’. Or as the people of Thailand might say, “same, same, but different”.

As some of you might know, I am the administrative owner of The Big Data Contrarians community group on LinkedIn, and even I was somewhat taken aback by a recent piece by Bernard Marr entitled 20 Stupid Claims About Big Data. So much so that I wrote a fairly complimentary comment on LinkedIn about it. The thing is, even as a posted it I was thinking to myself “you’ll be sorry”.

Today I read yet another Big Data ‘reformation’ piece on LinkedIn Pulse, this time from Matthew Reaney and with the compelling title of The 5 Myths of Big Data.

Call me naïve, call me illusory, and a believer in humankinds need for basic decency, but I frequently have the idea that praising moderately acceptable behaviour leads to even more good behaviour. But it was not to be, and as fast as one could say ‘what the hell is going on here?’ back came a surfeit of astroturfed Big Data bananas – from all directions – bigger, brasher and more bogus than ever before.

Make no mistake, Big Data hype hasn’t gone away, it has become more subtle, more cunning and even more misleading.

Leading the charge is the initiative to discredit Data Warehousing by all means possible, and the amount of bullshit, disinformation and blatant lies doing the rounds is beginning to look like Big Data hype reflecting Big Data itself, if only in terms of the vast volumes, varieties and velocities that this Big Data babbling bullshit comes in.

But seriously, we are simply getting more of the same, as the end of the Big Data hype war is declared, we are subject to a bombardment of Big Data boloney via Cloud, IoT, the Hadoop ecosphere (as if using Hadoop was someone linked to ecology and saving the planet), and especially this incredibly obnoxious and dopey vehicle for Big Data tripe known widely as the Data Lake – more on that stupidity at some other time. But onwards and upwards…

This all reminds me of a joke from many decades ago, retold in part from memory.

A teacher was looking for a subject about which her class pupils could write, to set as a homework exercise.

After much deliberation she decided to as ask the children to write about what they thought of the police?

Sure, not a good question, I know, and as I stated, this was many decades ago, when even grown-ups could be innocent and naïve and hopeful.

Anyway, when the children had handed in all their essays, the teacher read the essays and was disappointed to find that most of them were very wishy-washy and that the children were almost all unanimously indifferent or grudgingly respectful of the police, except for one. One of the children, let’s call him Dave, was very critical and had written “I don’t think much of the police.” When the teacher asked Dave why he had written that, he replied “All police is bastards, Miss”. The teacher was vexed by the reply, but being a good and caring teacher she considered how she could change this obviously hostile view of the bobby on the beat and the police detective taking evil doers out of circulation, so she decided to do something about it.

She had a bright idea and took her problem to the police and discussed what could be done to give the children a much more positive view of the police and the work they did, so they would see the police as a necessary part of society, to be respected but not feared.

As a result, the teacher and the police organised a police day at the school. It was a big party, with lots of free goodies, badges and posters, rides in patrol cars, sirens, interesting stories and a movie, and a big discussion with the police dog handler and his faithful and brave police-dog, Ajax. The police took special interest in Dave, he was the one they wanted to convince the most, and he was the one they made the most fuss of.

At the end of the day, the teacher again asked the children to write about what they got from the school police day that she had organised.

The following Monday, after all the essays had been handed in by the children, she sought out and read Dave’s essay, eager with anticipation.

This time it contained the surprising phrase of “I really, really don’t think much of the police.”

Again, the teacher asked Dave why he had written what he had wrote, especially considering all the effort the police had gone to in order to leave a good and lasting impression with the children in general, and Dave in particular.

He simply replied “the Police is cunning bastards, Miss.”

Personally, I have respect for the professionalism, courage and hard work of many officers in our police forces, but when it comes to my view of certain Big Data pundits – and naming no names, just watch my eyes – the feeling is not the same.

Make of that what you will.

Many thanks for reading.

If you enjoyed this piece or found it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks,

Martyn.

Big Data, ESP and Transubstantiation

19 Wednesday Aug 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, good start, goodstart, goodstrat

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vocationIf you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians:

Join The Big Data Contrarians here: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks.

To the layperson anxious for answers to complicated questions, the very idea of bringing together sets of disparate data and turning it into precious insights may seem like magic, a modern day alchemy, a goal placed well beyond the grasp of mere mortals. Fortunately, this is no longer the case, thanks in part to bagatelle-proportioned advances in Big Data and Big Data analytics and massive advances in imagination; we are able to look into the past, the present and the future, with absolute certainty. Continue reading →

Why so many ‘fake’ Big Data Gurus?

16 Sunday Aug 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this, good start, goodstart, Strategy

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Why so many ‘fake’ Big Data Gurus?

Where do you all come from?

Where do you all come from?

All your integrity’s gone

Now tell me, where do you all come from?

From ‘Where Do You All Come From‘ by Mott the Hoople Continue reading →

Big Data, the promised land where ‘smart’ is the new doh!

03 Monday Aug 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this, good start, goodstart, Martyn Jones, Strategy

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If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians:

Join The Big Data Contrarians here: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks.

So you want to ‘do’ Big Data

Now everyone is doing Big Data you don’t want to be the odd one out, right? Of course not.

Now, if you are serious about looking at Big Data from a business perspective then I will try and lend you some advice. If you are doing it from an IT or technology perspective, then I wish you good luck, and I hope that your Big Data initiative doesn’t turn into another tech crash-and-burn show.

Now some Big Data pros are telling us that the place to start with Big Data is with strategy. Now, I’m too polite to call this out as abject bullshit, even though it is, and will instead content myself by offering an alternative and simple approach to approaching and addressing Big Data.

My first piece of advice is this. DON’T START WITH STRATEGY!

Don’t start with Strategy

Strategy is a coherent, cohesive and executable response to a significant challenge.

Strategy is not a definition of objective, a wish list of what you are trying to achieve or aspirational goals of a nebulous nature. No, strategy is not the objective but a means of reaching that objective. Strategy is real, tangible and executable. Strategy is doing.

So what is a Big Data strategy?

If a company is looking at the Big Data options, the last place they should want to start out from is from strategy. That is as silly idea as they come. Starting with strategy on the road to formulating viable responses to significant challenges and opportunities is like saying that before we choose strategic options and a realisable strategy, then you must have a strategy in place.

Strategy is not working out what you want to achieve. That sort of thing should happen prior to any strategic work. Neither is strategy an exercise in establishing starting points, nor formulating questions nor understanding the challenges. All of this should come well before the major strategy aspects even kicks-in.

Big Data strategy is a realisable, tangible and manageable response to a significant challenge, one that depends heavily on the availability, usability and credibility of Big Data (or Very Large Data Bases) and the business value of processing that Big Data.

So, a word of advice. If you are thinking of embarking on a Big Data initiative, do not start with strategy. That is a really daft place to start.

Start with business imperatives

Start here instead. With real business imperatives. This is where you are thinking about the big and significant challenges to the business, and how, at a high level of abstraction, you could go about meeting those challenges. Here you identify your challenges and your responses, aligned to your objectives.

If you can identify business imperatives that make it absolutely necessary to include elements of Big Data, then go forward with that mandatory requirement in mind. If not, then don’t try to shoe-horn Big Data into a place where it really isn’t needed or wanted. Because if you go against the grain in this way it may well hurt you and your business, in more ways than you bargained for.

Know what you are looking for

In order to go out looking for data requirements driven by business imperatives, we really need to know what we are looking for.

What we are looking for maybe highly tangible or less so. We may have to derive the data we are looking for by refining, aggregating, enriching, filtering and cleansing. Therefore, with those and other aspects in mind, we can go out and find what we need.

How to find what you are looking for

From looking at the data requirements, you should have a good idea of potential sources of that data. Agility in this aspect is predicated on the premise that one knows the systems on the IT landscape, the business processes and all the potential sources of data – at a high level at least. So, this is not the sort of work you can do remotely with little or no knowledge of the clients business, IT setup, processes or culture.

But anyway, after you identify the sources you move on to the next step.

Check data availability

Here you discuss aspects of the data you require with the database / application platform owners to ensure that:

  1. they have the data you are looking for
  2. that quality of the data is known and data quality can be addressed
  3. that the data is relevant for what is needed
  4. that the cost of providing this data is not prohibitive
  5. that this data can be made available to you
  6. that service levels could be put in place, if and when required

So far so good. Once passed these hurdles (and don’t forget this is a super-simplification) we move in to the next.

Make proof of concepts

So, now we know:

  1. What data we need
  2. Where we can get it from
  3. How we get it
  4. What we need to do to make it usable
  5. How we need to analyse it

Therefore, we go ahead and create a proof of concept or three. Simples!

However, make sure that all prototypes are governed by these simple timeless guidelines:

  1. The proof of concept should be small enough to be doable in a reasonable time-frame. I would be rather generous for the very first pilot of its type in a company, but would set that limit at 90 days, tops.
  2. Make sure that the proof of concept is big enough to be significant. Again, ‘simple enough to be realisable’ and ‘large enough to be significant’, should go hand in hand.
  3. Arrange your proof of concept execution into sprints. So your 90 days may be made up of nine 10 day sprints.
  4. Don’t try and shoe-horn infrastructure aspects of your initiative into sprints, it just doesn’t work, and simply pisses people off.
  5. If a proof of concept looks like it will fail, then make sure it fails early. There’s nothing worse than having people insist on pushing a dead project to live the full length of its planned term. Failing early means that business doesn’t take a dim view of the pilot, and will be more open to new proof of concept initiatives.

Analyse the outcomes

You run your proof of concept. You analyse, assess and represent your outcomes. You socialise, present and interpret.

Revise your strategic outlook accordingly

When you’ve done that you are in now in a good position to estimate the usefulness of the exercise, from both a qualitative and quantitative perspective.

Did I mention technology?

I did not want to touch in specific aspects of technology in this piece, in part, because I did not consider it a central issue in the theme of things. Of course, as part of creating proofs of concepts and pilot schemes you may want to experiment with the swatch (swaith? oh for auto-correction) of technologies out there. So go ahead and evaluate ‘Big Data’ technologies, and don’t forget, the answer to every Big Data technology question isn’t an automatic ‘Hadoop’. There are other valid Big Data technology options around, such as Lustre and GPFS, or even Oracle, Teradata or EXASol. Also, remember this, if all you are working on is a prototype, a proof of concept or a pilot then you can try and negotiate a free license with any of the major DBMS vendors for that initiative. So negotiate, bargain and get the most appropriate technologies with the best deals.

That’s all folks

Finally I will leave you with three guidelines to consider:

  1. Don’t ask ‘how can I do Big Data?’ but ‘what data do we need?’
  2. You don’t need to seek out Big Data. If you really need it, and it’s available, and it’s adequate and appropriate, then you’ll be getting it soon enough.
  3. Avoid searching for a Big Data problem you don’t have, which can only be solved by Big Data technology you don’t need.

Many thanks for reading.

In subsequent blog pieces I will be sharing my views on the evolution of information management in general, and the incorporation novel and innovative techniques, technologies and methods into well architected mainstream information supply frameworks, for primarily strategic and tactical objectives.

As always, please reach out and share your questions, views and criticisms on this piece using the comment box below. I frequently write about strategy, organisational, leadership and information technology topics, trends and tendencies. You are more than welcome to keep up with my posts by clicking the ‘Follow’ link and perhaps you will even consider sending me a LinkedIn invite if you feel our data interests coincide. Also feel free to connect via Twitter, Facebook and the Cambriano Energy website.

For more on this and other topics, check out some of my other posts:

Absolutely Fabulous Big Data Roles – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/absolutely-fabulous-big-data-roles-martyn-jones?trk=prof-post

Not banking on Big Data? – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/banking-big-data-martyn-jones?trk=prof-post

10 amazing reasons to join The Big Data Contrarians –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/10-amazing-reasons-join-big-data-contrarians-martyn-jones?trk=prof-post

Amazing Data Warehousing with Hadoop and Big Data –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/cloudera-kimball-dw-building-disinformation-factory-martyn-jones?trk=prof-post

The Big Data Contrarians: The Agora for Big Data dialogue –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-contrarians-agora-dialogue-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

The Big Data Shell Game – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-shell-game-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Aligning Data Warehousing and Big Data –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/aligning-data-warehousing-big-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Big Data Luddites – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-luddites-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Data Warehousing Explained to Big Data Friends –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/data-warehousing-explained-big-friends-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Big Data, a promised land where the Big Bucks grow –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-promised-land-where-bucks-grow-martyn-jones-6023459994031177728?trk=mp-reader-card

The Big Data Contrarians – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-contrarians-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Is big data really for you? Things to consider before diving in –https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-really-you-things-consider-before-diving-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

Big Data Explained to My Grandchildren – https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/big-data-explained-my-grandchildren-martyn-jones?trk=mp-reader-card

If you enjoy this piece or find it useful then please consider joining The Big Data Contrarians:

Join The Big Data Contrarians here: https://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Many thanks.

Absolutely Fabulous Big Data Roles

03 Monday Aug 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this, good start, goodstart, Martyn Jones, Strategy

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Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose.

Jean-Baptiste Alphonse Karr

Prologue

I wrote a piece called ‘7 New Big Data Roles for 2015’. I published it on LinkedIn. Many people read it. Some people made suggestions. Others politely ignored it.

I listened to the suggestions, comment and criticisms, and revised the piece as a result.

So here, it is… I hope you like it. And if not, I might try again in six months’ time.

Continue reading →

Amazing Data Warehousing with Hadoop and Big Data

26 Sunday Jul 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this, Data Warehousing, good start, goodstart, hadoop

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Many thanks for reading, and don’t forget, please join The Big Data Contrarians.

Some time back, Bill Inmon, the father of Data Warehousing, took the Hadoop vendor Cloudera to task for putting out some confusing advertising.

In recent times, Cloudera have linked up with Ralph Kimball, who, as some in the data world will know, has been an eternal ‘rival’ of Bill Inmon.

For some, the name of Ralph Kimball has become synonymous with dimensional modelling, and although the Kimball Group once stated that Ralph did not invent the original basic concepts of facts and dimensions, Ralph has contributed much to the development of dimensional modelling and the innovative use of SQL. Subsequently, the Kimball Group reassessed, and are now labelling Ralph as the “Dimensional modelling inventor”.

Kimball and Cloudera have collaborated on a number of initiatives, such as a webinar and slide set, with particular emphasis on the theme of Hadoop and Data Warehousing.

Now, I do not know whether this is intentional or accidental, but this collaboration has produced a lot of disingenuous claims and dubious comparisons, so much so, that I get the impression that building the DW Disinformation Factory is becoming a cottage industry in its own right.

Personally, I can see scenarios in which Big Data complements Enterprise Data warehousing, and I have explained my vision and possible architectures for these scenarios. However, what some Hadoop vendors are alluding to in the Data Warehousing space, is actually quite mischievous and misleading and is not constructive in the least, in fact, the biggest side-effect is to muddy the Big Data and Data Warehousing waters even further. That is not good, either for the industry or for the customers, or indeed, for the professionals.

In one piece of content from Cloudera, we can read that…

“Dr. Kimball explains how Hadoop can be both:

A destination data warehouse, and also

An efficient staging and ETL source for an existing data warehouse”

On the first point? No, Hadoop will not be replacing Teradata, Oracle, EXASol or any other high-performance relational database management system.

On the second point. Hadoop could support a data source for Data Warehousing, as can many other technologies. However, there is no such animal as an ETL source. There are data sources and data targets, extractions, transformations and loads, and all that cool data management, but ETL is a technology, not a source.

I think Big Data may have a big future; it depends on how deeply the internet development culture pervades enterprise application development. A lot of what Big Data addresses is about is making up for shortfalls created by badly architected web applications and shoddy application development, in which data use and data persistence were at best workaround bodges, rather than being well designed and coherent approaches to data management.

Maybe this is some why people have a hard time explaining why they are considering using Hadoop technologies for Big Data. What would a CEO say if it was brought to their attention that Hadoop was being used in their business simply to make up for the fact that their internet applications are really shoddy examples of analysis, design, architecture and management? More to the point, what would the shareholders say if they understood the full ramifications behind the need to use Hadoop?

In many cases, I think that Hadoop can be an indication that your IT organisation did something very wrong in the past, and that in these cases Hadoop is the price one pays when you one does not want to bite the bullet and admit that to screwing up, big time.

In my opinion, it would make more sense to replace applications built on faulty architectures with robust and well-architected applications, rather than fix a problem by overmedicating the patient. This would mean that data generated and used by these applications could simply dovetail into standard decision-support data platforms, such as the Enterprise Data Warehouse.

As for Cloudera and their bizarre and babbling baloney about Hadoop replacing the Data Warehouse? I suggest they read a book in the subject of Building the Data Warehouse, and maybe buck up their ideas a bit. As Bill Inmon stated “You would think that the executives of Cloudera would have familiarized themselves with what a data warehouse is.”

As for recognised data professionals and influencers who support such Hadoop tripe? The less said the better. Eh, Ralphie?

That stated, maybe Cloudera, Kimball and the Big Data flim-flam merchants simply don’t care.

So go ahead, “turbocharge your Porsche – buy an elephant.”

Many thanks for reading. Don’t forget, please join The Big Data Contrarians. The best Big Data community on the planet.

You can’t hide your lyin’ Big Data

22 Wednesday Jul 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this, good start, Good Strat, goodstart, goodstrat

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As a child, I adored the USA rock band the Eagles, especially the musical talents of Joe Walsh. This explains the inspiration behind the title of this piece.

So, what’s going down at Ashley Madison?

Never heard of them? Off your radar? Surely not?

That stretches the bounds of incredulity. As even the people in Singapore’s Media Development Authority have heard of them. They even described their business site this way “it promotes adultery and disregards family values”, and subsequently will not allow them to operate in Singapore. Well, what a turn-up for the books.

On a more serious note, and as you might know, (from Wikipedia or some other ‘sites’,) Ashley Madison is a Canadian-based online dating service and social networking service marketed to people who are married or in a committed relationship. Its slogan is “Life is short. Have an affair.” It seems, if we are to believe various reports doing the rounds, that their Big Data has been compromised, big time.

Yes, I know, how could that possibly have happened, right?

According to some reports, Adison Mashley have around 37 million clients in the Big Data pool, and large caches of it have allegedly been stolen after an apparently successful hacking attempt was carried out. According to Krebs On Security, data stolen from the web site in question “have been posted online by an individual or group that claims to have completely compromised the company’s user databases, financial records and other proprietary information.”

But, again I ask, how can this happen?

I am not an avid fan of Big Data technology for core business use, and given the level of Big Data technology maturity, it sounds like a dopey idea. But each to their own.

What I will state is that my database management experience has tended to be associated with database technologies that can only be hacked as part of an inside job i.e. where people either know user IDs, passwords, IP addresses and layers of protection etc. or know of someone who does. Either someone who is a friend, part of the family (no, not that type of ‘family’) or someone who can be blackmailed into divulging the required access paths and security check workarounds.

However, taking a broader and more permissive view of this alleged hackerisation of Big Data, do we write it up as a Big Data success, i.e. The Amazing Big Data Affair? Put it down to a technical glitch and community faux pas? Or do we take a jaundiced view of the whole thing and keep it real? I await with baited breath for the enlightened opinions of the Big Data gurus.

Mitch ‘n’ Andy are not unfamiliar with ‘issues’ related to the use of people’s data. The Daily Dot carried a piece from contributing writer S. E. Smith with the headline ‘Why Ashley Madison is cheating on its users with Big Data’ in that piece, Smith states that “Like pretty much every other website on Earth, Ashley Madison spies on its users and crunches the data in a variety of ways to increase the bottom line.”

Belinda Luscombe writing in Time confirmed these suspicions with a piece titled ‘Cheaters’ Dating Site Ashley Madison Spied on Its Users’. She wrote:

In a study to be presented at the 109th Annual Meeting of the American Sociological Association in San Francisco on Saturday Aug. 16, Eric Anderson, a professor at the University of Winchester in England claims that women who seek extra-marital affairs usually still love their husbands and are cheating instead of divorcing, because they need more passion. “It is very clear that our model of having sex and love with just one other person for life has failed— and it has failed massively,” says Anderson.

“How does he know this? Because he spied on the conversations women were having on Ashley Madison, a website created for the purpose of having an affair. Professor Anderson, who as it turns out is a the “chief science officer” at Ashley Madison, looked at more than 4,000 conversations that 100 women were having with potential paramours. “I monitored their conversation with men on the website, without their knowing that I was monitoring and analyzing their conversations,” he says. “The men did not know either.”

Elsewhere, and as reported on Wikipedia, “Trish McDermott, a consultant who helped found Match.com, accused Ashley Madison of being a “business built on the back of broken hearts, ruined marriages, and damaged families.”

Wow, wow, and triple wow! What a way to run a dance hall!

Maybe they should reconsider their slogan, making it more snappy and apposite. How about “Life is short, we pimp your Big Data” as a starter? So go ahead, make your own and post it below. Have fun.

Many thanks for reading.

Oh, and one last thing before I go… GOOD-AD: Join The Big Data Contrarianshttps://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Consider this: Big Data Luddites

21 Tuesday Jul 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this, good start, Good Strat, goodstart, goodstrat, Strategy

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Bore da, pobl dda. A hyfryd dydd ‘Big Data’* i bawb.

When it comes to Big Data, some people accuse me of being akin to a Luddite. Nothing could be further from the truth. Not that the facts matter. In the age of superficiality and surfaces there is as much wilfully cultivated obliviousness as there is unashamed and unabashed term abuse. Add the prevailing underlying current of anti-intellectualism into the mix, and we have an explosive combination that manifests itself in the alliterative combination of bluff, bluster and banality.

— JOIN THE BIG DATA CONTRARIANS: http://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

I was reticent about writing this article, because it’s a bit like arguing against the irrational, self-interested and wilfully obtuse. Or as Ben Goldacre would have it, “You cannot reason people out of a position that they did not reason themselves into.” Therefore, a lot of care needed to be exercised. Indeed, Mark Twain once stated, “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.” Now, I wouldn’t go that far, and I do try to be nicely diplomatic, most of the time, but I can see where he was coming from.

Anyway, without more ado let’s get a handle on what a Luddite is, in terms I hope that most will understand.

According to Wikipedia (yes, I know) The Luddites were:

“19th-century English textile workers who protested against newly developed labour-economizing technologies from 1811 to 1816. The stocking frames, spinning frames and power looms introduced during the Industrial Revolution threatened to replace the artisans with less-skilled, low-wage labourers, leaving them without work.”

So why do I get a feeling that some people think that I am a Big Data Luddite?

Here is Peter Powell of PDP Consulting Pty Ltd putting me in my place below the line on my piece titled 7 Amazing Big Data Myths:

“With all due respect – your post does sound a little like what I could envisage an exchange between a man riding a horse and a man driving one if the first automobiles….sorry.”

Although a respectable knowledge of the technology and its evolution would inform otherwise, I assume that this means that I would be the “man riding a horse”…  An interesting piece of conjecture indeed, even if hat in lacks in accuracy is made up for by the inexplicable certainty of belief. Still, it’s fascinating to discover just how many ‘experts’ think that this stuff – the sort of stuff I was doing in the mid to late eighties at Sperry and later Unisys – is bleeding edge innovation,

Sassoon Kosian a Sr. Director of Data Science at AIG, had this to tell me on my piece entitled Amazing Big Data Success Stories:

“Yes, cynical indeed… here is another amazing Big Data success story. You go on your computer, type in any search phrase and get instantaneous and highly relevant results. It is so amazing that a word has been coined. Guess what that is…”

What to say? There goes a person who seems to believe that the history of search starts and ends with the Google web search engine. Something slightly less than a munificently inapposite comment, only outdone by its tragically disconnected banality.

More recently, Bernice Blaar had this to say about my take on Big Data in general and The Big Data Contrarians in particular.

“Master Jones may well be the great and ethical strategy data architecture and management guru that the chattering-class Guardian-reading wine-sipping luvvies drool over, but he is also a brazen Big Data Luddite. No, actually far worse than a Luddite, he`s a Neddite, because with his ‘facts’ and ‘logic’ (what a laugh, you can prove anything with facts, can’t you [tou}???) he is undermining the very foundation of the Big Data work, shirk and skive ethic that has been so hardily fought for by the likes of self-sacrificing champions and evangelists of the Big Data revolution, to wit, such as those bold, proud and fine upstanding members Bernard Marr, Martin Fowler and Tom Davenport, for example, and the brave sycophants that worship at their feet. Martyn is worse than Bob Hoffman, Dave Trott, Jeremy Hardy, Mark Steel, Tab C Nesbitt and Bill Inmon, all rolled into one. He may be a great strategist, but I wouldn’t hire him. Contrarian Luddite!”

And then followed it up with this broadside:

“The Big Data Contrarians group are nothing more than a bunch of over-educated clown-shoes who are trying to scupper the hard-work of decent people out to earn a crust from leveraging the promise of a bright future. In a decent society of capital and consumers, they would be banned off the face of the internets.”

How does one reciprocate such flattering flatulence? How can one possible respond to such a long concatenation of meaningless clichés? Though to be fair, I quite liked being referred to as a Neddite, whatever that is.

Anyway, to set the record straight, this is where I stand.

A contrarian is a person who takes up a contrary position, especially a position that is opposed to that of the majority, regardless of how unpopular it may be.

Like others, I am a Big Data Contrarian, not because I am contrary to the effective use of large volumes, varieties and velocities of data, but because I am contrary to the vast quantities of hype, disinformation and biased mendaciousness surrounding aspects of Big Data and some of the attendant technologies and service providers that go with the terrain. I don’t mind people guilding the lily (to use an English aphorism for exaggeration), but I do draw the line at straight out deception., which could lead to unintended consequences, such as creating false expectations, diverting scarce resources to wasteful projects or doing people out of a livelihood. That’s just not tight.

Does that make me a Luddite (or a Neddite)? I don’t think so, but do make sure that your opinion is your own and is arrived at through reason, not some other persons bullying hype. As I wrote elsewhere some moments ago “If you have to lie like an ethically challenged weasel to sell Big Data then clearly there is something amiss.”

As always I would love to hear your opinions and comments on this subject and others, and also please feel free to reach out and connect, so we can keep the conversation going, here on LinkedIn or elsewhere (such as Twitter).

Many thanks for reading.

 

— JOIN THE BIG DATA CONTRARIANS: http://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Photograph: Delegates at my Big Data Summer Camp in Carmarthen (Wales).

*Data mawr

Data Warehousing Explained to Big Data Friends

20 Monday Jul 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Big Data Analytics, Consider this, Data Warehousing, good start, Good Strat, goodstart, goodstrat

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Okay, before we get started I have to declare the real intent for posting this piece. It is to get you to join The Big Data Contrarians professional group here on LinkedIn.

To apply to join the best Big Data community on the web simply navigate to this address http://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976 (or paste it into your browser) and request membership, the process is quick and painless and well worth the effort.

Now for the rest of the news…

There are many common misconceptions amongst the Big Data collective about Data Warehousing. There are common fallacies that need clearing up in order avoid unnecessary confusion, avoidable risks and the damaging perpetuation of disinformation.

Big Picture

In the dim and distant past of business IT, the best information that senior executives could expect from their computer systems were operational reports typically indicating what went right or wrong or somewhere in between.  Applied statistical brilliance made up for what data processing lacked in processing power, up to a point, because even heavy lifting statistics requires computing horsepower, which in those days was really a question of serious capital expenditure, which not all companies were willing to commit to.

Then, and curiously coincidentally, people around the world started to posit the need for using data and information to address significant business challenges, to act as input into the processes of strategy formulation, choice and execution. Reports would no longer just be for the Financial Directors or the paper collectors, but would support serious business decision making.

Many initiatives sprang up to meet the top-level decision-making data requirements; they were invariably expensive attempts, with variable outcomes. Some approaches were quite successful, but far too many failed, until the advent of Data Warehousing.

Back then, most of the data that could potentially aid decision-making was in operational systems. Both an advantage and a problem. Data in operational systems was like having data in gaol. Getting data into operational systems was relatively easy, getting it out and moving it around was a nightmare. However, one of the advantages of operational data is that it was generally stored in a structured format, even if data quality was frequently of a dubious nature, and ideas such as subject orientation and integration were far from being widespread.

Of course, data also came in from external sources, but usually via operational databases as well. An example of such data is instrument pricing in financial services.

Therefore, briefly, a lot of Data Warehousing started as a means to provide data to support strategic decision-making. Data Warehousing ways not about counting cakes, widgets or people, which was the purview of operational reporting, or to measure sentiment, likes or mouse behaviour, but to assist senior executives, address the significant business challenges of the day.

Who’s your Daddy?

Bill Inmon, the father of Data Warehousing, defines it as being “a subject-oriented, integrated, time-variant and non-volatile collection of data in support of management’s decision making process.”

Subject Oriented: The data in the Data Warehouse is organised conceptually (the big canvas), logically (detailing the big picture and) and physically (detailing how it is implemented) by subjects of interest to the business, such as customer and product.

The thing to remember about subject areas is that they are not created ad-hoc by IT according to the sentiments of the time, e.g. during requirements gathering, but through a deeper understanding of the business, its processes and its pertinent business subject areas.

Integrated: All data entering the data warehouse is subject to normalisation and integration rules and constraints to ensure that the data stored is consistently and contextually unambiguous.

Time Variant:  Time variance gives us the ability to view and contrast data from multiple viewpoints over time. It is an essential element in the organisation of data within the data warehouse and dependent data marts.

Non-Volatile:  The data warehouse represents structured and consistent snapshots of business data over time. Once a data snapshot is established, it is rarely if ever modified.

Management Decision Making: This is the principal focus of Data Warehousing, although Data Warehouses have secondary uses, such as complementing operational reporting and analysis.

In plain language, if what your business has or is planning to have does not fully satisfy the Inmon criteria then it probably is not a Data Warehouse, but another form of data-store.

The thing to remember about informed management decision making is that it needs to be as good as required but it does not need to achieve technical perfection. This observation underlies the fact that Data Warehouse is a business process, and not an obsessive search for zero defects or the application of so called ‘leading edge’ technologies – faddish, appropriate or not.

JOIN THE BIG DATA CONTRARIANS: http://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Some Basic Terms

Before we delve into the meaning of Data Warehousing, there are a couple of terms that need to be understood first, so, by way of illustration:

Let’s follow the numbers in the simplification of the process.

  1. We gather specific and well-bound data requirements from a specific business area. These are requirements by talking to business people and in understanding their requirements from a business as well as a data sourcing and data logistics perspective. Here we must remember at all times not to over-promise or to set expectations too high. Be modest.
  2. These business requirements are typically captured in a dimensional data model and supporting documentation. Remember that all requirements are subject to revision at a later data, usually in a subsequent iteration of a requirements gathering to implementation cycle.
  3. We identify the best source(s) for the required data and we record basic technical, management and quality details. We ensure that we can provide data to the quality required. Note that data quality does not mean perfection but data to the required quality tolerance levels.
  4. Data Warehouse data models modified as required to accommodate any new data at the atomic level.
  5. We define, document and produce the means (ETL) for getting data from the source and into the target Data Warehouse. Here we also pay especial attention to the four characteristics of Data Warehousing. ETL is an acronym for Extract (the data from source / staging), Transform (the data, making it subject oriented, integrated, and time-variant) and Load (the data into the Data Warehouse and Data Mart).
  6. We define, document and produce the means for getting data from the Data Warehouse into the Data Mart. In short, a bit more ETL.
  7. User acceptance testing. NB Users must ideally be involved in all parts of the end-to-end process that involves business requirements, participation and validation.

This is a very simplified view, but it serves to convey the fundamental chain of events. The most important aspect being that we start (1) and end (7) with the user, and we fully involve them in the non-technical aspects of the process.

JOIN THE BIG DATA CONTRARIANS: http://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Business, Enterprise and Technology

Essentially, a Data Warehouse is a business driven, enterprise centric and technology based solution for continual quality improvement in the sourcing, integration, packaging and delivery of data for strategic, tactical and operational modelling, reporting, visualisation and decision-making.

Business Driven

A data warehouse is business centric and nothing happens unless there is a business imperative for doing so. This means that there is no second-guessing the data requirements of the business users, and every piece of data in the data warehouse should be traceable to a tangible business requirement. This tangible business requirement is usually a departmental or process specific dimensional data model produced together in requirements workshops with the business. We build the Data Warehouse over time in iterative steps, based on the criteria that the requirements should be small enough to be delivered in a short timeframe and large enough to be significant.

Typically, a Data Warehouse iteration results in a new Data Mart or the revision of an existing Data Mart.

Enterprise Centric

As we build up the collection of Data Marts, we are also building up the central logical store of data known as the Enterprise Data Warehouse that serves as a structured, coherent and cohesive central clearing area for data that supports enterprise decision making. Therefore, whilst we are addressing specific departmental and process requirements through Data Marts we are also building up an overall view of the enterprise data.

Technology Based

By technology, I mean technology in the broadest sense of techniques, methods, processes and tools, and not just a question of products, brands or badges.

Unfortunately, there is a popular misconception that Data Warehousing is primarily about competing popular and commercial available technology products. It isn’t, but they do play an important role.

Architecture

The following is an example of a very high-level Data Warehouse architecture diagram.

Methodologies

Various methodologies support the building, expansion and maintenance of a Data Warehouse. Here is one example of a professional data integration methodology, produced, maintained and used by Cambriano Energy.

And here is an information value-chain map as used by Cambriano Energy as part of its Iter8 process management. There are alternatives, many of which do a satisfactory job.

Last but not least, this was (from memory) the way that Bill Inmon’s Prism Solutions ETL company used to view the iterative EDW building process.

JOIN THE BIG DATA CONTRARIANS: http://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

Keeping it Shortish

At this point, I decided to cut short further explanations on aspects on Data Warehousing. However, if you have any question then please address them to me and I will do my best (or something close) to answer them.

That’s all folks

Hold this thought for another time: If you think you can replace a Data Warehouse, that is not a Data Warehouse, with another approach to ‘Data Warehousing’ that doesn’t produce a Data Warehouse, for as fast and cheap as one can do it, then you still don’t have a Data Warehouse to show for all of your efforts. That is not a great place to be.

Therefore, you see, Data Warehousing was never about a haphazard approach to providing random structured, semi-structured and unstructured data of various qualities, provenance, volumes, varieties and velocities, to whomever was of a mind to want it.

Many thanks for reading.

 If you want to connect then please send a request. I you have any questions or comments then fire them off below. Cheers :-)

Oh… and one last thing before I go… DON’T FORGET TO JOIN THE BIG DATA CONTRARIANS: http://www.linkedin.com/grp/home?gid=8338976

 

The Big Data Contrarians – New Big Data Community

03 Friday Jul 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, community, Good Strat, goodstart, goodstrat

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Big Data, community, Good Strat, goodstart, goodstrat

Friends, peers and colleagues, lend me your bandwidth and 10 minutes of your time.  Gather around and let me tell you about the greatest, most interesting and fantastically diverse Big Data and Data community right here in our very midst on this amazing LinkedIn community.

We have a new Big Data/Data group, and the group is aptly named The Big Data Contrarians, and yet it is neither a ‘me too’ group, of which there are too many to mention, or a ‘belief circle’, of which the less said, the better. Not, The Big Data Contrarians group is a place for cool opinion pieces, creative abrasion, practical insight and (within the realms of the possible) BS free comment.

However, before going into more detail about the group, I would like to digress for a moment.

Like many people, I take a lot of inspiration from outside my own professional spheres of practice, principles and technologies, and this is no less true when it comes to advertising.

Two of my real influencers – the real kind not the LinkedIn kind – are advertising legends Dave Trott (also author of Predatory Thinking) and Bob Hoffman (the Ad Contrarian), who are exceptionally experienced, talented and creative people, of the NoBS (no flim-flam) kind. Indeed, it was after reading some of Bob’s and Dave’s recent articles that I decided to get this group registered on LinkedIn, which, love it or loath it, is where many of us connect.

So, I hear you ask “What’s The Big Data Contrarians, Mart?”

Okay, to be fair, The Big Data Contrarians group is about far more than just being contrarian and a legitimate means of inciting discussion, for as reasonable as that is. It’s also about arguing against or openly rejecting mistakenly cherished and contrived Big Data beliefs and ‘institutions’ and established Big Data hype, speculation and opinion. It’s about separating Big Data fads, fantasises and folk-tales from Big Data reality.

What we seek to understand and convey is where, when, how and for what ends data (including Big Data) can be used to derive legitimate benefits. Moreover, stated from a position of reason and facts, and not simply projected as an issue of Big Data faith, speculation and clairvoyance.

On the other side, we can call out the Big Data hype for what it is, and just as Bob Hoffman calls out the social media and advertising BS babblers in his trade, this too lends a platform for people to do the same with the disreputable and dubious practices of Data gurus, courtesans and ‘influencers’.

“So, Mart, is being a Big Data Contrarian a bit like being a Big Data Luddite?”

Well, not really, but the problem with having so many people who are new to IT is that the past is a mystery top them, so anything that is new to them is actually taken as new, whether it is new or not.

Those who know will know that technologies of distributed file stores and search over unstructured data has been around for quite some time, and some of the “new” technologies that we big-up today, are actually simple developments of data technologies that go back to the seventies and eighties, or maybe even before.

However, this is not essentially about being anti-technology or even in advances in the application of technology, but of understanding that it isn’t helpful for the media, the big industry players and their indentured acolytes, to railroad, cajole and bully businesses into buying Big Data technology they don’t need, to solve Big Data problems and opportunities they don’t have.

That said, it’s up to the members of The Big Data Contrarians to decide on what shape the community should take, and as it is an open forum in democratic terms, the members have equal rights in presenting their own opinions, lessons learned and other insights.

So, if you haven’t yet drunk the Big Data kool-aid, come on down to The Big Data Contrarians, the place for everyone interested in Big Data/Data and its many potential uses.

Many thanks for reading.

Of course, this piece will also not feature on LinkedIn’s Big Data channel, because apparently that channel editor (naming no names) doesn’t like anyone raining on their particular Big Data flim-flam parade.

#BigData #BigDataChannel

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Raise the Big Data Flim-Flam High

30 Tuesday Jun 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this

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Big Data

If there were ever a more apt rallying slogan for the Big Data BS babblers it would be “We BS about Big Data so that you don’t need to think”… and you know what? That’s how it is working.

The trouble with the hype is that almost everyone and their dog is in on it. From the freelance or indentured Big Data gurus to the Gartners, IBMs and HPs of this world. Everyone who is anyone is trying to jump on the Big Data bandwagon, whether it makes sense or not. Hell, if I could become ludicrously rich and infamous on the back of Big Data, I would jump the Big Data shark as well.

The other trouble is that the Big Data hype is very inconsistent in almost all areas, apart from the general unstated agreement there seems to be that Big Data will bring riches beyond the dreams of avarice, for everyone who wants it.

So, let’s assuming that one wants to cash in on Big Data, what’s the first thing that we need to understand?

Big Data comes in big data volumes, it has many data varieties, meaning it has a number of distinct formats, and it comes at us with increasing velocity, which most of the time we simply do not notice.

So what does that tell us? Right, Big Data is data; just more of it, more flavours of it, generated and transmitted at faster and faster rates.  To simplify, data is like water (Oh, no not another analogy) and whereas Data Warehousing is the Rhine or the Mississippi Delta, Big Data is the Ma and Pa of the Iguazu, Victoria and Niagara Falls.

So, what were the next questions I asked myself on the way to the land of Big Data health, wealth and happiness?

I asked, “if you have a Big Data success story then let’s hear the skinny”, such as:

  • Please detail data that has used to create new insight and understanding?
  • How was this data sourced, treated and stored?
  • How was the resulting data queried? Let’s see the queries, the code, the pseudo-code and the code narrative.
  • What were the results of the queries? In technical and business terms, please.
  • What normalisation of the results took place?
  • How did those results drive insight? In business terms, please.

Perfectly straightforward, right? These are the sorts of questions that one should be able to ask of a Data Warehouse user and then reasonable expect to get a coherent set of answer back in return.

Well, seems like when it comes to Big Data this sort of line of questioning and reasoning is somewhat problematic.

Which is a problem, because I am seeing fantastic claims made for Big Data, which is great, and I wish we all could become more prosperous from Big Data, but I can’t seem to get a handle on quite how one goes about it. It’s as if ‘tangible’ was anathema when it comes to practical and detailed examples of Big Data in action. You know, driving tangible business benefits through an understandable value chain of processes, ingredients and outcomes.

So, come on Big Data guys, gals and gurus, it’s time now to pony up, put up or shut up.

The Amazing ROI of Big Data

30 Tuesday Jun 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this, Strategy

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Big Data, ROI

For every professional bubble-head and bozo ‘bigging up’ Big Data there are at least ten intangible, unintelligible and phantom Big Data success stories.

Why do I write that? Simples! Because that is what we have.

From the perspective of non-IT business users, what does a real IT based success story look like?

Here’s some examples:

  • We ran a Big Data project and the end-result was increased sales and margins, which added $21M to the bottom line. The overall project cost, including cost of business disruption, was $7M.
  • We deployed Hadoop technology to identify potential influencers and purchasers on Twitter. As a result of the campaign we increased sales of the Widgets by 8% (adding $9M is revenues and $3M in profits on an investment of $1M).
  • Big Data helped us to identify and exclude significant errors of judgement introduced into our new corporate strategy. As a result we averted possible losses of more than $10M. Total cost of aversion exercise was $5M. $5M up and no egg on our faces.

These are fictitious examples of tangible benefits that might be accruable to Big Data. But, they are not factual, they are made up.

Remember this. They are not real-life stories.

Now, for some real-lifelike examples of benefits accrued from Big Data.

  • Big Data vendor strikes gold! The Big Data technology vendor GREPACLE today signed an enterprise wide licensing arrangement with the Fed for an estimated initial $750M, covering the years 2010 to 2017. The deal includes all industry-ready Hadoop “free ‘n’ open-source software” developed by GREPACLE. AWKACLE, who brokered the deal, expect to clear a $33M net profit from the arrangement.
  • OLLY-HARDY, the west coast hardware giant, has signed up WALLYCO who have handed over $60M as the first instalment for the provision of a cheap and cheerful battle-hardened commodity-hardware infrastructure that will replace the existing legacy infrastructure currently based on OLLY-HARDY MPP and SMP hardware and Oracle and Teradata software. A second contract billed to be worth in excess of $100M is in the pipe-line and is expected to be signed during the next quarter.
  • The profits of information theology research and technology advisory firm Gardening Leave jumped a clear 25% over the last three quarters due solely to sales of it’s reports and services in the Big Data domain.

The names changed, and the project details finessed, to protect the guilty, but they are three simple, clear and fabulous examples of how gold is obtained from Big Data.

However, there are many other Big Data success stories to consider, including:

  • The indentured Big Data pundits. Who wouldn’t lie for a slice of the pie? Right! But not everyone has scruples, values or even ethics when it comes to the filthy lucre.
  • The pro-Big Data press and their Big Data advertisers and ‘infomercialisers’. There still is money in getting people to advertise, big time.
  • The external service provider. The hardware may be commodity. The disk storage may be ample, cheap and cheerful. The unit cost of staff may be lower. But, you will be paying 10 times over the odds to your favourite outsourcer/offshoring business just for the privilege of having them screw up your Big Data project… 18 months down the line. You will even pick up the tab for breaches of data privacy and data protection. But don’t worry, paying someone else to make mistakes and learn on your money and time is the highest form of corporate altruism.

Well, that should give one a flavour of the direction of Big Data, of the benefits accruable and to whom the benefits really accrue.

Now here’s a thought:

Most of the success stories seem to have the sale of a Big Data project, Hadoop’s ‘grep awk ecosystem’ and ‘development’ services as its central tangible success criteria.

At best, these are dubious Big Data tech and service vendor success stories.

What tangible Big Data client benefits are there on view in the public domain? How about non-IT business Big Data ROI? Same for Hadoop ROI? Same for Big Data and Tech Stack service ROI?

What about… Who? What? Where? When? How? Why?

Oh, there aren’t any success stories like that or they are so secret that one cannot but allude to them in generic BS terms.

But, seriously? Do people still swallow that type of mendacious flim flam?

Many thanks for reading.

Big Data Explained to My Grandchildren

29 Monday Jun 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data

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All Data, Big Data, made simple

Ban pan doeth peir

ogyrwen awen teir

The Book of Taliesin 

Once upon a time, a hobgoblin of digital moonshine stalked the land. Its name was Shirley Temple (but, it was better known as Big Data), and it had many followers.

Few really knew where Big Data had come from, because it just appeared overnight. Like owls, snow, rumour and astroturfing flim-flam merchants.

Some say the Gardner brought it in on the bottom of their wellies after a particularly tough night on the lemonade.

One night, a man with a black dog told me that it was really all a load of old nonsense, dreamed up by Redwood Shore Larry, to shake things up a bit.

Others, of the more superstitious bent, claimed that the giant who lived in the Big Blue mansion on the hill, had concocted it, from sugar and spice and all things dodgy and nice

The more cynical amongst the population just pointed at its high priests, acolytes and bicycle boys, and had a good old laugh.

Yet others claimed that it was a digital immaculate conception and a divine-revelation of mega-trend setting proportions that would change the face of the Lleyn peninsula, forever.

Elsewhere, some talked of dark deeds, of wickedness, or that it was a psycho-paranormal phenomenon closely associated with the cultish cult of the badly drawn Yellow Elephant. A wonderful wacky, off-the-wall and global orco-centric sect that sacrificed the processing-cycles of reason, strategy and coherence on the altar of half-baked pragmatism, bodgerism and winging-it.

Nonetheless, some of the global villagers did express opinion that this was no new phenomenon, and that they had seen such a sinister semblance before. Knowledge and experience had informed them. They seemed to intrinsically know that a timeless feature of data is its variable volumes, its variable velocities, its increasing varieties and, because we insisted on hoarding so much of it, its increasingly expansive footprint.

But, how did they know?

They only had the gardener, the butler and the cook to corroborate their suspicions.

We know what we know, and what we don’t know we know what we don’t know, now, that is, but don’t tell, unless we do, or don’t, or not. So I’m glad we cleared that one up.

Down the valleys, across the moors and over the waves. From Bangor to Abertawe via Machynlleth and Caerfilli. Big Data, it moved and expanded, and expanded and moved again. Dong! Dong! Dong! Ominous, humongous and smelling of sulphur and a badly spiced kebab.

The Big Data mini-meme spread like wildfire fuelled by petrol and crack. It was a force to be harnessed, a force for good and bad. Even though no one really knew what it was, and nobody knew how to do it, many claimed to have done it, and successfully so. It didn’t matter how, what where or when. Front interface, back-end processor, client-server, no one and nothing was free or safe.

The benevolent Big Data virus reached everyone. The rich, the poor, the shop on the corner, and the girl next door. Everyone knew its name and that it was new and mega and good and bad and all of that.

The thing is, Big Data wasn’t really anything new. As we now know.

But, at the time, for some people, especially the so called high-ups and professional people, it was a big deal, even in Pontypridd! Like a major inflection point in the evolution of the generation and use of what we now call data, or to use the vernacular, digital gold-gold.

You see, back then, people wanted to make another class of data and another class of gold, and another series of lovely, chubby little verbose categories to describe it. People needed another name, one that represented some data class values, spirituality and imprecision. It was a time of post-modernism, and we were always stoned, mazed or drunk.

Some of my peers at the time – not all of them, just the exceptionally plain Jane, weird and alternative ones – told me that Big Data was data that came in bigger volumes, at greater velocities and in greater varieties.

The first I heard that, I was gobsmacked… Honest to God!

I know probably you’ll laugh at that, now, and you may even tell your friends and butties just how superstitious, primitive and money-grubbing we were back then.

So whilst you are making fun of your old granddad, do not forget either, that is the way it was in those days, down the data mining towns and Big Data pits of South Wales.

I know it is hard to believe, but back in those days, people really believed in that nonsense. I didn’t have any time for it myself, but many did, and many people made a living of sorts just talking and writing about it.

It’s hard to believe now, but at one time we were really dumb, but as we didn’t want to stand out from the crowd by revealing that we didn’t know, we just stood back and let the buffoons, clowns and comics run the show. Whilst we exclaimed, “these guys are really good”, “I wonder if he can turn Big Data into wine” or “maybe he does requests and children’s parties”.

Now we look at data, all data, and we call it…. Yes… data.

How we have advanced. It’s amazing.

But then, when it all died down, as these things do, in their given time, we regained our senses, of sorts, we got back on our feet and we progressed in a sane, rational and humane way.

Now we can look back and see things for what they were. The Big Data hullaballoo, that you have never heard of, was the last gasp of some the biggest IT dinosaurs, who had tied their hopes and aspirations, ridiculously so in my view, to some toys created by the naïve for the gullible. It was always going to end in tears, and it did.

Now you know.

So, this ends the story of Big Data, also known as Shirley Temple.

Goodnight kids!

Many thanks for reading.

As always, please share your questions, views and criticisms on this piece using the comment box below. I frequently write about strategy, organisational leadership and information technology topics, trends and tendencies. You are more than welcome to keep up with my posts by clicking the ‘Follow’ link and perhaps even send me aLinkedIn invite. Also feel free to connect via Twitter, Facebook and the Cambriano Energy website.

For more on this and other topics, check out my other recent posts:

  • Big Data Predictions for 2015
  • 7 New Big Data Roles for 2015
  • Data Made Simple – Even ‘Big Data’
  • Big Data is Dead!
  • Why Destructive Eagerness? The Data Warehouse Example
  • Big Data and the Vs
  • Did Big Data Kill the Statistician?
  • Infotrends 2015: 21 Directions in Information Management
  • On not knowing Climate Change
  • Big Data Robitussin – Big Data: Read all about it!
  • Absolute certainty…
  • Mugged in Data Hell

#BigData #BigDataAnalytics #Decency #Ethics

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Is big data really for you? Things to consider before diving in

13 Saturday Jun 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Strategy

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Big Data, Strategy

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

“For the likes of Google, Twitter and Facebook, Big Data is an intrinsic part of their business and plays a key role in their ability to survive and thrive. However, it is not for everyone. Here’s how to know for sure if Big Data is for you.”

The rest of the article appears on my IT Circus blog hosted by IT World (Copyright © 2015 IDG Enterprise)

Link: http://www.itworld.com/article/2934368/big-data/is-big-data-really-for-you-things-to-consider-before-diving-in.html

#BigData #DataAnalytics #Qualification

The Hadoop Honeymoon is Over

16 Saturday May 2015

Posted by Martyn Rhisiart Jones in Big Data, Consider this, Good Strat, Good Strategy, Martyn Richard Jones, Strategy

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

Big Data, hadoop, Martyn Jones, Strategy

Listen up Big Data playmates! The ubiquitous Big Data gurus, tied up in their regular chores of astroturfing mega-volumes, velocities and varieties of superficial flim flam, may not have noticed this, but, Hadoop is getting set up for one mighty fall – or a fast-tracked and vertiginous black run descent. Why do I say that? Well, let’s check the market. Continue reading →

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