Laughing@BigData – What’s in the eBook
I thought people might like to know what’s inside my absolutely fabulous, totally amazing and utterly brilliant eBook Laughing@BigData
Here’s the table of contents:
What others are saying about the author.. 10
Big data for business sceptics.. 27
Did big-data kill the statistician?.. 33
Agile@Scale is bullshit by design.. 37
Management talking points.. 51
Ten easy steps to brand and energise the ‘agile way of working’ mind-set 56
I told you so! Hadoop is sinking because big-data is bullshit.. 58
Saving Hadoop and big-data.. 60
Learning to hate Agile@Scale.. 67
The big-data bestiary: the immutable weasel.. 70
Big data on the roof of the world.. 74
You’ve joined the big-data gym, so now what?.. 77
Working in Agile and being yourself.. 80
Postmodern digital stories: we’ve never seen anything like this before 82
AI and big-data: a pig’s breakfast.. 86
Three foolish things you can do with a data lake.. 89
What if the Hadoop ecosphere were a box of chocolates.. 95
We didn’t have time for all of that nonsense.. 98
Don’t fight the bull, isolate it.. 100
Baby naming and religious and social trends.. 103
Big data and the fantastic five?.. 104
The value of a good data model?.. 107
Protests? Most people are happy with things as they stand.. 111
On your way to data warehouse success? We’ll put a stop to that! 112
Big data, a promised land where the big bucks grow… 120
Myths of strategy and data warehousing.. 123
Creativity and corporate IT: plumbers, not artists.. 127
Creativity: three stories.. 130
Business process intelligence?.. 134
The big-data “wow wow” factor.. 139
The mythical low hanging fruit.. 142
Nothing achievable is impossible.. 144
Historical big-data will save the future.. 148
The leading cause of IT project failure: big-data informs.. 156
The bastards of big-data: you can’t blame Putin for all of this nonsense 159
The fifteen major big-data roles.. 161
And, what would the ladies and gentlemen like today?.. 169
Dressing uniformly for success.. 173
Want the same partner in old age? Never marry, tall! 180
Never trust a guy called Johnny.. 181
Big data reveals what lies behind global warming.. 182
Win data warehousing friends and influence people.. 183
The world’s best data quotes.. 190
Business value from data? Try commercial analytics.. 195
The IT circus and the infinite loop.. 201
The right management stuff: lions led by donkeys.. 204
Remember when data warehousing was Hadoop and big-data?.. 207
The leader, the technologist and their accountability.. 212
The great information struggle: us and them.. 215
IT and data project managers: be less dog! 219
Developing and aligning IT strategy.. 221
Big data and dopey quotes.. 231
What every CEO needs to know about big-data.. 234
Be more idiot: business as usual in data management.. 242
Build it, and they will come.. 245
A single source of truth.. 248
Big data 7s: talking points.. 254
Become an instant big-data rock star.. 257
7+1 amazing big-data myths.. 264
Top habits in highly ineffective relationships between ICT and business 272
CEO! To your own self, be true.. 277
Intentional dilemmas: before honour comes humility.. 279
Historic threads of data warehousing.. 281
The awkward squad: big-data informs.. 283
The amazing world of Fred’s big-data.. 289
Consider this: big-data and the pot of tea.. 293
What’s all the fuss about dark data?.. 297
Consider this: big-data forever! 300
Consider this: taming big-data.. 303
Is big-data really for you? Things to consider before diving in 305
Looking for your most valuable data? Follow the money.. 308
What can data warehousing do for us now?.. 311
Information technology mirror balls! 314
When is offshoring software development the wrong choice? 316
Big data tales: Bernice and the Martians.. 319
Agile@Scale is corporate terrorism: discuss.. 323
Clueless in IT: can’t listen, aren’t learning, won’t win.. 325
Ensuring personal legitimacy in the social media age.. 327
If relational was the new thing.. 329
How to turn data into knowledge.. 331
In the brave new world, is everything like an onion?.. 333
A few small thoughts on data that you might like to ponder.. 340
The hidden mysteries of big-data analytics.. 346
The top ten amazing AI-big-data-analytics gurus.. 348
Information trends for the next decade.. 352
Big data and social media in ad-land.. 356
Being dishonest about honesty.. 358
Ten things to know about data warehousing.. 361
The ten commandments of ensuring sensible big-data.. 362
Stop whining and start training.. 364
Influencers worth having.. 366
Pile the big-data flim-flam high.. 369
On not knowing sentiment analysis.. 371
The delayed greening of IT.. 380
The risk of ignoring the risks.. 382
The thoughts of Chairman Marty.. 386
The proverbs, axioms and sayings of data: a selection.. 395
Big data’s totalitarian tics.. 397
Data-less apps: revolutionary IT.. 399
Amazing outcome-based big-data projects.. 402
Big data and the curse of the temple of Java.. 404
Spain: not banking on big-data.. 407
Destructive eagerness – the data warehouse example.. 409
Sucking up to Microsoft?.. 412
The information management manifesto for the 2020s.. 413
Big data success, exclusive offer! 418
The big-data contrarians.. 423
Enjoy!
Martyn Data Jones
To celebrate the United Nations World Telecommunication and Information Society Day my new eBook laughing@bigdata will be free to download from all Amazon sites on Sunday 17th May 2020.
Why laugh at Big Data? Informative, education and entertaining, Laughing@BigData gives you real insider views on big data, agile, AI, data, deep learning, data warehousing, data lakes, IT strategy, leadership and management and much more. If you have the theory this gives you insight into the practice.
https://goodstrat.com/2020/05/08/laughing-at-big-data-ebook-great-new-insight-into-realities-of-it/
Get your free copy of laughing@bigdata from Amazon (usual Price $9.98, free on Sunday 17th May 2020).
USA: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B086HS6VWX
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