The Bad Data Bible

Narrator: How do you raise a data child to be a great, honest, committed data professional? That is the question.
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Narrator: How do you raise a data child to be a great, honest, committed data professional? That is the question.
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Narrator: To know data, you must know the grammar of data, information and knowledge. Depending on the language and its precision, accuracy, and richness, we will have a reasonable idea of approaching data and information modelling issues. To know data and information, you must understand the business well. People with a technical background and little or no business knowledge are often oblivious to their ignorance regarding business data and information. When you have a technician in the industry who doesn’t understand this, it’s a problem. If your technician is located thousands of kilometres from your company, it’s a disaster waiting to happen. Let’s listen to Pete and Dud wax lyrical about the importance of language and grammar.
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Martyn Jones, Bilbao, 2nd October 2024

Narrator: Not all data we have is related to strictly business domains such as products, organisation structure and corporate real estate. A lot of data we collect is simply about monitoring all aspects of IT, applications, networking, security and governance. To name just a few.
Dud: What’s all this data in my exhaust? Is my data back-end going well, or do I have a mechanical data governance issue? All this OLTP exhaust data is so tedious and tiring.
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Martyn Jones, Manhattan, 29th September 2024
Narrator: According to some data-mesh folk, data warehousing is “a data management construct that dates back to the eighties,” I have a problem with that. It’s as if that was somehow a bad thing. Is it? For me, that’s quite a weak argument that, in a way, treats people as if they were idiots.
It is like someone asking Newton, “So, Sir Isaac, you don’t still believe in that old gravity nonsense, do you?”
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Martyn Jones, Brooklyn, 27th September 2024

Narrator: Another false meme doing the rounds is that Data Warehousing necessarily means monolithic databases. This is not what data warehouses have been for many businesses.
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I wrote an article that took to task purveyors of the data lakehouse nonsense. It got plenty of positive reactions and quite a few negative opinions. But what surprised me the most were the number of people who had already swallowed their pitch. Hook, line and sinker.
So why did I bother to express my opinions on the subject?
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Martyn Richard Jones, Gif sur Yvette 23rd September 2017

Hi, Friends. As always, it’s great to be able to engage with you again. I am writing to you from the splendorous, wooded and verdant French town of Gif sur Yvette, and I wanted to take this opportunity to address aspects of data for an audience beyond the interests of data management and architecture people.
There is confusion about some of the fundamental aspects of business data, and there shouldn’t. If we strip away all of the boloney, it’s a subject that is quite approachable. In short, ‘it is not rocket surgery’. (more…)

“Half the time she did things not simply, not for themselves; but to make people think this or that; perfect idiocy she knew for no one was ever for a second taken in.” Virginia Woolf, Mrs. Dalloway
It’s all very well for the blithering Big Data bullshitter savants to now claim, after a massive exercise in u-turning, that Big Data isn’t after all about data volumes, velocities and varieties, but about some minor variation on the theme of data architecture, management and processing.
But, look at the mess! (more…)

Martyn Richard Jones
I have worked in data architecture and management for three decades, I have become a recognised expert in my field, and as a result I have become almost oblivious to the fads, fancies and fashions that pass through IT. However, being an expert in a field also means that from time to time we are oblivious to the difficulties that some people may have when trying to understand issues and concepts that we simply take for granted – because, one simply knows. This is the case with data.